SD on the QT. By Walter Mencken. Subscribe to this blog.
Entries
Taxi Drivers to Be Heard on Decency Demands
Livery Laborers Lament Lardy Lovers' Lecherous Liasons "Yaa Raabi - put that sh*t away!" Attention, amorous San Diegans, especially those of you helping to make this the 10th most obese city in the nation: San Diego's taxi drivers want you …
Growth Market
Playboy Enterprises Inc. Gives $40 Million Grant to Local Biotech Orgonovo to Speed Production of "Organ Printer" "We believe this product has the potential to enhance the lives of millions of men, if you know what we mean." FEVERISHLY TRACKING …
Put It on a Postcard!
San Diego Selects Unfinished Central Library as City's Official "Iconic Image" "When you've got weather like this..." Much has been made over the proposal to erect a pair of 500-foot titanium rabbit ears at the end of the Midway Museum …
UCSD Responds to Cheating Report: "We Prefer to Think of It As Preparing Students for Success."
UCSD Dept. of Graduate Admissions: "If by 'cheating,' you mean 'optimizing performance,' then I'm not sure why we're having this conversation." "Anyone who has a problem with appropriating someone else's work as their own has obviously never been on the …
Vanity Fair, Vanity Fair, All Is Vanity Fair
City of Chula Vista Demands, Receives Apology from Fancy National Magazine "Who you callin' 'sputtering'? Have you even seen Eastlake?" BORED TO DEATH IN THE DULLEST CITY IN AMERICA - "Sometimes," said Chula Vista Mayor Cheryl Cox, "it feels like …
"Don't Worry, There Will Be Eggs"
Plan for 500-foot "Rabbit Ears" sculpture on Navy Pier elicits confusion, concern. "Everybody loves bunnies!" SIX ROUNDS IN AT THE WATERFRONT BAR, DOWNTOWN - "Rabbits," slurred Midway Aircraft Carrier Museum Director Anton Marshall. "San Diego and rabbits. San Diego IS …
Efforts by San Diegan Help Critically Endangered Chupacabra
FEVERISHLY DIALING THE PEOPLE AT ANIMAL PLANET - As recently as five years ago, the Chupacabra was in danger of becoming a myth. Only three were thought to remain in the wild, and an effort to house one at the …
Stopping the Brown Tide
Critics Say Plan to Rebuild U.S.-Mexico Pacific Ocean Border Fence Will Do Little to Stop Influx of Invasive Brown Kelp "A six-inch gap is more than enough room for these buggers to slip through and take up spots once held …
Senior Volunteer Police Association Endorses District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis
On Thursday afternoon, just after naptime but before the early-bird specials start at Denny's and IHOP, the California Reserve Senior Peace Officers Association announced its endorsement of District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis for mayor of San Diego. The group, made up …
Philip Rivers to Coach Turner: "Please Stop Making Me Throw All Those Interceptions"
Unsubtle, Earnest Quarterback Begs Coach-Provocateur To Be Allowed to Throw to Teammates "Frankly, I don't understand it. What kind of playbook has interception patterns?" DAWN OUTSIDE OUR LADY OF EXCELLENCE CHURCH, AFTER SPENDING ALL NIGHT IN PRAYER - In a …
Unhappy Ending?
In Snafu, SDPD Permits & Licensing Unit Reports on Massage Parlors Wind Up on Happy Ending Review Site "We meant to shut Hana Spa down. Instead, we doubled their business." TOWELING OFF AND COUNTING OUT THE $120 FOR THE TIP, …
In Bold Step Forward, Patrick Henry High School Selects Husky Lesbian Couple as Left and Right Offensive Tackle
Coaches Cite "Toughness, Rage, and a Low Center of Gravity" as Deciding Factors in Historic Gesture "These young ladies have been mocked by jocks their whole lives. Now they're sharing their pain by bringing the hurt." SORTING OUT LOCKER ROOM …
In Bold Step Forward, Patrick Henry High School Selects Pretty Lesbian Couple As Homecoming King and Queen
Fellow Students Cite Hotness As Crucial Deciding Factor in Historic Gesture "Up until now, they've all been kind of butch. At least we can imagine these two kissing." EAGERLY ANTICIPATING THE INCORPORATION OF THIS STORY INTO A PLOT POINT ON …
Three's a Trend: Will "Jack the Stripper" Strike Again?
It began with Rebecca Zahau, the 32-year-old woman found bound, naked, and hanged by her neck from the second-floor balcony of a Coronado mansion. The death was ruled a suicide, but questions persisted: why did she bind herself first? Why …
Dia De Los Muertos Vivos?
In Rare Cross-Cultural Move, Tijuana City Officials Recruit Haitian Voodoo Priests to Raise Zombie Army on Traditional Day for Honoring the Dead. Dept. of Death Spokesman Carlos Morbid: "The cemeteries are full; we need the room. Besides, who but the …
The Rock Church Brings Back Chastity Belts
Church spokeswoman Donna Douthat: "Those Rennaissance dudes were wise in their way. But where they used metal and spikes to guide the flesh, we're interested in a more spiritual approach. You have to take off your belt to take off …
Breaking! Reader Editor Holman Opens Up and Swallows Pride
Notorious Owner-Editor-Publisher Goes the Other Way on Long-Standing Gay Ad Ban. "Maybe now I'll get some love." CELEBRATING LIKE IT'S THE FALL OF THE BERLIN WALL, LITTLE ITALY - "It was the San Diego Press Club Awards that did it," …
San Diegans for Safe Drinking Water Claim Fluoridation Leads to Superfluous Apostrophes
Ad on Presidio Sentinel website: Let's zoom in, shall we? A compelling argument, to say the least.