Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Quiet

Whenever my sister Shirley recommends a book, I read it at once.

The first time, long ago, she handed me a white-covered paperback and said, "opening paragraph." I perused it and kept going. When I turned the page, she said, "I couldn't stop either."

The book was Catcher in the Rye.

Shirley sent me an email last week: "Susan Cain's Quiet is amazing."

It is. Subtitled The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking, the book builds an impressive case for the one-third to one-half of humanity that prefers the spotlight to shine elsewhere.

Cain (pictured) starts with the stereotype. Introverts are: painfully shy, withdrawn, anti-social (even misanthropic), and so on. These traits, which our culture treats as negatives, conjure up the image of a hermit, curled in the womb position, shunning the madding crowd.

But, Cain says, "probably the most common - and damaging - misunderstanding about personality type is that introverts are antisocial and extroverts are pro-social. But neither formulation is correct; introverts and extroverts are differently social."

Introverts can be outgoing, can enjoy parties and other group gatherings, "but ...they prefer to devote their social energies to close friends, colleagues, and family.

"They listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation."

These natural tendencies go against what Cain calls the "Extrovert Ideal: the omnipresent belief that the ideal self is gregarious, alpha, and comfortable in the spotlight."

The dominant culture favors those who cry "damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead." Charismatic audacity reigns in movies, TV, and advertising, which often sells consumers the promise of a more winning personality.

Quiet's about those who ask, "Torpedoes?"

They have a power too, says Cain, albeit a quiet one. They observe, remember, and compare. The book doesn't substitute one stereotype for another. It explores a diversity of possibilities. Introverts also leap, but first they look below.

Cain's primary example, Rosa Parks, was an "introvert" who said few words but changed American history.

Using scores of well-chosen stories, anecdotes, and mountains of research, the book attempts to create space in the culture for those who drawn to the inner life. "The trick is not to amass all the different kinds of available power, but to use well the kind you've been granted."

Cain says she isn't trying to topple the Extrovert Ideal. But in a soft-spoken, thoughtful style - she confesses to being an introvert - she has written an insightful, possibly paradigm-nudging critique of our culture.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all

Previous article

Gonzo Report: Downtown thrift shop offers three bands in one show

Come nightfall, Humble Heart hosts The Beat

Whenever my sister Shirley recommends a book, I read it at once.

The first time, long ago, she handed me a white-covered paperback and said, "opening paragraph." I perused it and kept going. When I turned the page, she said, "I couldn't stop either."

The book was Catcher in the Rye.

Shirley sent me an email last week: "Susan Cain's Quiet is amazing."

It is. Subtitled The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking, the book builds an impressive case for the one-third to one-half of humanity that prefers the spotlight to shine elsewhere.

Cain (pictured) starts with the stereotype. Introverts are: painfully shy, withdrawn, anti-social (even misanthropic), and so on. These traits, which our culture treats as negatives, conjure up the image of a hermit, curled in the womb position, shunning the madding crowd.

But, Cain says, "probably the most common - and damaging - misunderstanding about personality type is that introverts are antisocial and extroverts are pro-social. But neither formulation is correct; introverts and extroverts are differently social."

Introverts can be outgoing, can enjoy parties and other group gatherings, "but ...they prefer to devote their social energies to close friends, colleagues, and family.

"They listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation."

These natural tendencies go against what Cain calls the "Extrovert Ideal: the omnipresent belief that the ideal self is gregarious, alpha, and comfortable in the spotlight."

The dominant culture favors those who cry "damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead." Charismatic audacity reigns in movies, TV, and advertising, which often sells consumers the promise of a more winning personality.

Quiet's about those who ask, "Torpedoes?"

They have a power too, says Cain, albeit a quiet one. They observe, remember, and compare. The book doesn't substitute one stereotype for another. It explores a diversity of possibilities. Introverts also leap, but first they look below.

Cain's primary example, Rosa Parks, was an "introvert" who said few words but changed American history.

Using scores of well-chosen stories, anecdotes, and mountains of research, the book attempts to create space in the culture for those who drawn to the inner life. "The trick is not to amass all the different kinds of available power, but to use well the kind you've been granted."

Cain says she isn't trying to topple the Extrovert Ideal. But in a soft-spoken, thoughtful style - she confesses to being an introvert - she has written an insightful, possibly paradigm-nudging critique of our culture.

Sponsored
Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

What Are You?

Next Article

Prom Queen Controversy

Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader