Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Requiem for the Vampire

Had a fascinating job interview the other day out in the material world. The in-person part was quick and painless, took about ten minutes of my day. More fun was the "assignment" portion of the 'view. Basically, the nightclub in question is looking to raise the level of their bar food to compete with their trendy nightclub neighbors. "Email me what you'd put on the menu" the chef said to me. What fun! Last night I sent her three bomb diggity salad ideas, three of my best notions for cheap and easy appetizers, and three sandwich offerings. I am perhaps most proud of my "Sloppy Joe" (ground lamb in a light tomato curry with crispy fried onions served on a toasted bulkie roll) and a nice pizzetta e fichi (white pizza with ricotta cheese, sage infused EVOO, and fresh figs). Cross yer fingers for me!

Onward to more normal blogging and the awarding of a the second most coveted award on the whole interwebs, the daily Runner-Up:

Coolers - $5 (Normal Heights)

"So, I'm no longer running my black market kidney business and I have no need of these coolers. Also have thermos for rush jobs." Really, I can see no other need for having so many coolers, call my scope limited if you must, but black market kidneys just seems the only logical explanation. Since I don't feel like writing a story about some sort of urban kidney burglar, I will award the Ultimate Prize to:

Antique Melodeon - $350 (Normal Heights)

It's Dracula's private home organ! What's not to love about the visual of Vlad ticking the ivories in a Normal Heights living room? He probably pops down to Lestat's every now and again for a latte and a bit of complaining that "people always get him wrong," to which the clerks at the coffee shop most likely pay little heed.

Poor, misunderstood vampire, left all alone in a world that only vaguely recognizes him as a cause for fright and terror. Once, his name was synonymous with fear. These days, he plays second fiddle to H1N1 and Facebook stalkers. What's a vampire to do in the modern world?

Rather than adapt, Vlad spends his days in relative isolation, listening to Joy Division and nursing a terrible caffeine addiction. Why should he move away from what he knows? Shadows and darkness have always been his place. He does not belong in the bright world of today, where his nefarious deeds are the stuff of legend and nobody really believes that there's anything to fear out there, in the darkness, beyond the point of reason. No, all Dracula can do is take himself into self-imposed isolation--he rarely even stalks the night to feed, these days--curbing the bloodlust with cup after cup of French Roast.

We miss you sometimes, Vlad. You brought the fear of darkness out of the depths of the mind and into reality. No one ever had his finger on the scared and fleeting pulse of the world quite like you did. If blood must be shed (and sometimes it seems like that's the case, doesn't it?) then who better to shed it than you? You let fear be mythic, rather than pragmatic, which is something we we miss these days, having banished all the old nightmares.

Won't you come back, Vlad, and put on one more show?

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all

Previous article

3 Tips for Creating a Cozy and Inviting Living Room in San Diego

Had a fascinating job interview the other day out in the material world. The in-person part was quick and painless, took about ten minutes of my day. More fun was the "assignment" portion of the 'view. Basically, the nightclub in question is looking to raise the level of their bar food to compete with their trendy nightclub neighbors. "Email me what you'd put on the menu" the chef said to me. What fun! Last night I sent her three bomb diggity salad ideas, three of my best notions for cheap and easy appetizers, and three sandwich offerings. I am perhaps most proud of my "Sloppy Joe" (ground lamb in a light tomato curry with crispy fried onions served on a toasted bulkie roll) and a nice pizzetta e fichi (white pizza with ricotta cheese, sage infused EVOO, and fresh figs). Cross yer fingers for me!

Onward to more normal blogging and the awarding of a the second most coveted award on the whole interwebs, the daily Runner-Up:

Coolers - $5 (Normal Heights)

"So, I'm no longer running my black market kidney business and I have no need of these coolers. Also have thermos for rush jobs." Really, I can see no other need for having so many coolers, call my scope limited if you must, but black market kidneys just seems the only logical explanation. Since I don't feel like writing a story about some sort of urban kidney burglar, I will award the Ultimate Prize to:

Antique Melodeon - $350 (Normal Heights)

It's Dracula's private home organ! What's not to love about the visual of Vlad ticking the ivories in a Normal Heights living room? He probably pops down to Lestat's every now and again for a latte and a bit of complaining that "people always get him wrong," to which the clerks at the coffee shop most likely pay little heed.

Poor, misunderstood vampire, left all alone in a world that only vaguely recognizes him as a cause for fright and terror. Once, his name was synonymous with fear. These days, he plays second fiddle to H1N1 and Facebook stalkers. What's a vampire to do in the modern world?

Rather than adapt, Vlad spends his days in relative isolation, listening to Joy Division and nursing a terrible caffeine addiction. Why should he move away from what he knows? Shadows and darkness have always been his place. He does not belong in the bright world of today, where his nefarious deeds are the stuff of legend and nobody really believes that there's anything to fear out there, in the darkness, beyond the point of reason. No, all Dracula can do is take himself into self-imposed isolation--he rarely even stalks the night to feed, these days--curbing the bloodlust with cup after cup of French Roast.

We miss you sometimes, Vlad. You brought the fear of darkness out of the depths of the mind and into reality. No one ever had his finger on the scared and fleeting pulse of the world quite like you did. If blood must be shed (and sometimes it seems like that's the case, doesn't it?) then who better to shed it than you? You let fear be mythic, rather than pragmatic, which is something we we miss these days, having banished all the old nightmares.

Won't you come back, Vlad, and put on one more show?

Sponsored
Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Basically Little Dinosaurs

Next Article

A Vital Part Of The Breakfast Pantheon

Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader