Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

The Naked Schwinn Twins (or...Coke is it!)

The last couple days I’ve seen video footage on the news of police chasing someone that stole a Coke machine.

Now, for those that haven’t seen the video – how would you guess someone would steal a Coke machine? A couple big lugs trying to pick the thing up? Nah. Tie a rope around the machine and have that attached to your car, and hit the gas.

Now, I’m not sure what exactly the criminals wanted. A few cold sodas and a lot of quarters? When criminals do this with ATM machines it makes a little more sense.

Anyway, the police cam shows the thing sparking up as it’s being dragged. Made me think this might work the next time someone is getting married. Instead of empty cans tied to the bumper, just have full cans inside a Coke machine.

The police have been getting in trouble lately because they’ve maced people unnecessarily. But if I were one of the cops that finally caught these losers, I wouldn’t be able to resist pulling a can of Coke out of the broken machine and opening it right in their face and watching them get sprayed by the sticky stuff.

Another interesting story involving the cops (and with no video), had two naked men riding their bikes at night in a New Zealand town. They were completely naked.

The funny thing is, the police didn’t cite the Schwinn twins for indecent exposure. They were merely warned they needed helmets.

So, everyone’s strict about that law it seems.

I would’ve warned the riders about the dangers of the banana seat, or things getting caught in the spokes.

I just remembered a party I was at once. A person told me they were pictured on the inside of a KISS album. It showed the crowd, but apparently, he was the most clearly visible fan, holding his arm up.

I wonder if either of these naked cyclists was pictured in the Queen “Jazz” album.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all

Previous article

Victorian Christmas Tours, Jingle Bell Cruises

Events December 22-December 25, 2024

The last couple days I’ve seen video footage on the news of police chasing someone that stole a Coke machine.

Now, for those that haven’t seen the video – how would you guess someone would steal a Coke machine? A couple big lugs trying to pick the thing up? Nah. Tie a rope around the machine and have that attached to your car, and hit the gas.

Now, I’m not sure what exactly the criminals wanted. A few cold sodas and a lot of quarters? When criminals do this with ATM machines it makes a little more sense.

Anyway, the police cam shows the thing sparking up as it’s being dragged. Made me think this might work the next time someone is getting married. Instead of empty cans tied to the bumper, just have full cans inside a Coke machine.

The police have been getting in trouble lately because they’ve maced people unnecessarily. But if I were one of the cops that finally caught these losers, I wouldn’t be able to resist pulling a can of Coke out of the broken machine and opening it right in their face and watching them get sprayed by the sticky stuff.

Another interesting story involving the cops (and with no video), had two naked men riding their bikes at night in a New Zealand town. They were completely naked.

The funny thing is, the police didn’t cite the Schwinn twins for indecent exposure. They were merely warned they needed helmets.

So, everyone’s strict about that law it seems.

I would’ve warned the riders about the dangers of the banana seat, or things getting caught in the spokes.

I just remembered a party I was at once. A person told me they were pictured on the inside of a KISS album. It showed the crowd, but apparently, he was the most clearly visible fan, holding his arm up.

I wonder if either of these naked cyclists was pictured in the Queen “Jazz” album.

Sponsored
Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

San Diego cops talk candidly

I started at $1005 a month. Bus drivers get twice as much as we do.
Next Article

Police Shootings and Ninjas

Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader