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Wild Animal Park and Wedding Accident

Time for another multiple choice. Put those thinking caps on, grab a #2 pencil, and get ready to go.

There was an accident involving a 40-year-old employee of the Wild Animal Park. What happened to that employee?

A) He fell asleep during his lunch break and got so sunburned he was taken to the hospital. Their insurance is trying not to cover the treatment of the second degree burns, even though it technically happened at the work place.

B) An emu got loose and attacked him.

C) Like former President Bush, he choked on a peanut. It was purchased at the snack bar (with his employee discount) and there's talk of a lawsuit.

D) He was run over and trapped underneath a truck.

E) All of the above.

If you guessed "D", you are correct.

He was unloading the truck in the morning, and it was left in gear. He put the back gate of the bed up and the vehicle rolled forward. He tried to get into the truck, but it struck a curb and he fell. The truck ran over his leg, trapping him for half an hour.

Now, on to the second and final question of the pop quiz.

Disaster struck at a wedding in Rome, when:

A) A man with a Ceasar haircut crashed the wedding and attacked the groom (Brutus Bellini) claiming he and the bride were in love.

B) A drunk uncle stood up to do a toast and collapsed into the wedding cake. The guests whipped out video cameras and laughed. He ended up suffocating on the white frosting.

C) A low flying helicopter, thinking this was a secret celebrity wedding, blew the cake onto the ground and ruined the hair of the bride.

D) The bride thought it would be a cute idea to throw her bouquet from a plane. The bouquet got caught in the engine and the plane crashed, injuring two people.

As crazy as it sounds, it's D.

I mean, really...Sully landed a plane in the Hudson. But this was one of those ultralights, which is like a lawn chair with a lawnmower engine attached. I guess those can be taken down by flowers, as well as birds.

I'm sure the wedding on this Tuscan countryside would've been nice, had the pilot been able to clear the rear rotor.

But, if the bride isn't one of those women that freaks out over every little thing going wrong on her big day...she could look at the bright side. The plane didn't crash into the youth hostel that was nearby. The pilot was only slightly hurt (the flower hurler with him suffered several broken bones).

If the couple lighting a candle symbolizes them uniting...I'm guessing this might symbolize a marriage crashing and burning, and ending in divorce a few years down the road.

They should have it annulled immediately.

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Where’s the bat at?

Time for another multiple choice. Put those thinking caps on, grab a #2 pencil, and get ready to go.

There was an accident involving a 40-year-old employee of the Wild Animal Park. What happened to that employee?

A) He fell asleep during his lunch break and got so sunburned he was taken to the hospital. Their insurance is trying not to cover the treatment of the second degree burns, even though it technically happened at the work place.

B) An emu got loose and attacked him.

C) Like former President Bush, he choked on a peanut. It was purchased at the snack bar (with his employee discount) and there's talk of a lawsuit.

D) He was run over and trapped underneath a truck.

E) All of the above.

If you guessed "D", you are correct.

He was unloading the truck in the morning, and it was left in gear. He put the back gate of the bed up and the vehicle rolled forward. He tried to get into the truck, but it struck a curb and he fell. The truck ran over his leg, trapping him for half an hour.

Now, on to the second and final question of the pop quiz.

Disaster struck at a wedding in Rome, when:

A) A man with a Ceasar haircut crashed the wedding and attacked the groom (Brutus Bellini) claiming he and the bride were in love.

B) A drunk uncle stood up to do a toast and collapsed into the wedding cake. The guests whipped out video cameras and laughed. He ended up suffocating on the white frosting.

C) A low flying helicopter, thinking this was a secret celebrity wedding, blew the cake onto the ground and ruined the hair of the bride.

D) The bride thought it would be a cute idea to throw her bouquet from a plane. The bouquet got caught in the engine and the plane crashed, injuring two people.

As crazy as it sounds, it's D.

I mean, really...Sully landed a plane in the Hudson. But this was one of those ultralights, which is like a lawn chair with a lawnmower engine attached. I guess those can be taken down by flowers, as well as birds.

I'm sure the wedding on this Tuscan countryside would've been nice, had the pilot been able to clear the rear rotor.

But, if the bride isn't one of those women that freaks out over every little thing going wrong on her big day...she could look at the bright side. The plane didn't crash into the youth hostel that was nearby. The pilot was only slightly hurt (the flower hurler with him suffered several broken bones).

If the couple lighting a candle symbolizes them uniting...I'm guessing this might symbolize a marriage crashing and burning, and ending in divorce a few years down the road.

They should have it annulled immediately.

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