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Charlie Kaufman, Ante Up

New York had the right idea when it ran a comparison of the recently uncovered (by the Feds!) Celebrity Poker Ring and the Matt Damon poker film Rounders. But it didn't go far enough: instead of being compared to a poker film, Celebrity Poker Ring should be a poker film. (In fact, if someone hasn't optioned this blog post by noon, I'll eat my lunch.)

Charlie Kaufman, who handled the celebrity relationship with reality with such odd aplomb in Being John Malkovich, could be brought in to write it, and we could maybe get Soderbergh to direct - he seems to manage a certain chumminess among ensemble casts. Casting, of course, is already taken care of: Leo, Tobey, Matt, and Ben can all play themselves. I love the idea of Maguire, the lowest-wattage star of the bunch and also the least intimidating, being the secret mastermind ($110,000 on a single hand!)

All that remains is to select someone to be Brad Ruderman, the hedge fund manager alleged to have lost some $25 million of investors' money to these famous rascals. And even that isn't much of a stretch: hellooo, Bruce Campbell:

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Jazz guitarist Alex Ciavarelli pays tribute to pianist Oscar Peterson

“I had to extract the elements that spoke to me and realize them on my instrument”

New York had the right idea when it ran a comparison of the recently uncovered (by the Feds!) Celebrity Poker Ring and the Matt Damon poker film Rounders. But it didn't go far enough: instead of being compared to a poker film, Celebrity Poker Ring should be a poker film. (In fact, if someone hasn't optioned this blog post by noon, I'll eat my lunch.)

Charlie Kaufman, who handled the celebrity relationship with reality with such odd aplomb in Being John Malkovich, could be brought in to write it, and we could maybe get Soderbergh to direct - he seems to manage a certain chumminess among ensemble casts. Casting, of course, is already taken care of: Leo, Tobey, Matt, and Ben can all play themselves. I love the idea of Maguire, the lowest-wattage star of the bunch and also the least intimidating, being the secret mastermind ($110,000 on a single hand!)

All that remains is to select someone to be Brad Ruderman, the hedge fund manager alleged to have lost some $25 million of investors' money to these famous rascals. And even that isn't much of a stretch: hellooo, Bruce Campbell:

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4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
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