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A Fireman in the Alley
Hey Shizzy, Thanks for reading and commenting. I am also 31, and my fellow thirty-ish friends definitely make me feel like an old lady when I am forced to read beacause I don't really understand the small i-things in their fast hands. Sometimes I'd like to return to a time when the internet was made of black and and white text only group posts and combat boots with oversized plaid was cool. Although, then I would be a lot younger, a lot less in tune with myself and thus a lot less awesome. Oh well, I guess as we get older, some of us will just be labeled as old-fashioned. I'm ok with that.— August 30, 2009 3:04 p.m.
A Fireman in the Alley
Ask me anything...and good question. I can only say that I am taking a page out of "He's Just Not That Into You." Behrendt suggests that men are simple in their desires. If they really want you, they will go for it. If they are, as you all suggest, into many women, or not too interested, but you happened to be there, they will flirt and seem nterested, but they won't ask you out. I am not sure if I support this theory whole-heartedly, but I did in fact believe in the modern day and that women should ask men out stuff then I asked a guy out (who had once before, when I was unavailable, asked me out) and he said, "yeah, but I'm really busy. I don't really have time...but we can hang out." This was a guy that was previously jocking me so hard it bordered on odd. Now, I realize this is just one situation and I don't know if it is me specifically and the strange effect I have on men, but historically men do this thing with me where they want me and want me, then when I reciprocate and they are out. I mean from one day to the next, like a light switch. So now, instead of falling for their immediate attentions, I wait for further evidence that they are serious. I wouldn't suggest this for everyone, but this is what I am going by for now. I also see the flaw in that I give attention to guys who have previously given me interest vs. a cold ask out, but I hate when poeple ask me out when I have not given them any indications that I am interested so I try to avoid doing this to others.— August 21, 2009 9:19 a.m.
Reality Shows -- From Brazilian Politicians to our own Octomom
I am insatiably interested in the current atmosphere of famous-for-no-reason as popularized by Paris Hilton. The poeple on reality TV, as well as the Octomom, and Paris, have figured out that Americans love to hate them. The larger the jackass the more we watch. The theory also goes for stars behaving badly and then "caught" by the paparazzi. We love that odd mix of sad crazy, so they elicit some sort of sympathy, and bat-crazy, so we can watch what they do next. We can also easily put them as opposite ourselves with this enticing cocktail of mental instability. It's like they are animals in the zoo and we can judge their behavior from a position of safety. Who's crazier? They are capitalizing on our inability to stop talking about them, watching them and hating them. Of course they put people in suitcases and have eight babies. They were erratic to begin with and then we continue to put them on camera because we love it. Celebrities can barely handle the spotlight (Lindsay Lohan), what do we expect? p.s. I love reality TV in a hilarious kind of way— August 20, 2009 9:54 p.m.
A Fireman in the Alley
Antig- Nope...I'm not even going to give it that much thought unless they have the cajones to ask directly for my number and then call me (not text me). If that ever happens again (the calling) I will try to remember to ask good questions (I am honostly not fantastic at that if I think a guy is really cute). In truth, by nature I am a skeptic, but I think I just don't take any of this stuff that seriously because I am not seriously looking. My fatal or fantastic flaw is that I truly love being single so my attitude right now is more like, "if it happens, it happens".— August 20, 2009 9:28 p.m.
A Fireman in the Alley
Surfp- First, I'm pretty sure Anti has not agreed to go on a date with you, but I'll let her speak on that if she likes. Second, I never said anything about my plans with or without this guy. I'm still reeling from the effect that a compliment for a man who has many good qualities has on you. Why does it matter? Must I lead with distrust, hostility, etc? What does your expertise prescribe? It is my choice to be open-minded and take people at their word unless they prove me otherwise. No amount of digging can help you avoid heartache. P.S. I choose to be a little more fearless than that. In dating, in my opinion, one needs to "go big or go home". It's always a risk. What are you gonna do. Walk around covering your balls for the rest of your life in case they get hit? You'd look like a pervert or someone who caught something horrible.— August 20, 2009 7:34 p.m.
San Diego Police's Serial Inebriate program
I really enjoyed your article. I had no idea that we had a program like this in San Diego County. I am so happy that our city is using its money to help others, which eventually helps everyone at large. I am happy that you included the monetary facts. I would imagine and agree that we spend far more on alchoholics who never get help. Thanks again for bringing this issue into the foreground.— August 20, 2009 6:55 a.m.
A Fireman in the Alley
Sorry Surfpup, I didn't connect the bartending to the opening a bar clearly enough. I meant he was trying to get back into business and analysis. I'm not saying he's a rocket scientist...anyway I don't understand why it's all so unbelievable. I mean I understand, but...he really did fit the bill. You would think I had said he claimed to be Jesus or Bhudda. Sheesh! : ) SDaniels- I'm an Americanist. I specifically studied a lot of ethnic American Lit. As for Anti, I love her comments as usual. I appreciate a good debate/argument. No worries. This is fun.— August 19, 2009 9:34 p.m.
A Fireman in the Alley
Anti- I don't know if you are implying that I have yet to have the kind of experiences that would make me bitter, or that I am still too young, but I make concious efforts to give people a fair shake and maintain a line above bitterness. Of course, at times, I can barely make it over that line, but most of the time, it is fine. Further, I think bitternes in dating will lead to me being bitter in life in general. I know...I'm from OB so this is some happy go lucky hippie crap, but I am speaking from experience. I was once terrifyingly cynical and bitter and it changed who I was....but thanks for the book suggestion : )— August 19, 2009 7:51 p.m.
A Fireman in the Alley
P.S. I don't want to just assume that everyone is lying. I will take people at their word and then look for the little things they do that either rveal them to be a douche or prove that they are who they say they are. I will not be bitter!— August 19, 2009 8:48 a.m.
A Fireman in the Alley
Hey, a girl has to hope/keep the fantasy alive : ) Clearly I'm not calling him because if he was truly serious he would have asked for my number or tried to contact me through my friend. I'm smarter than I look (sometimes). And no neither of these friends were ever court reporters.— August 19, 2009 7:51 a.m.