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Wnen The EKG Goes Flatline...Was It Worth It?
But what if I have an unconditional love for KFC?— September 29, 2009 2:10 a.m.
Vision Restored for the Blind
I can't help wondering what this looks like. How can you look this person in the "eye" when their eye is a tooth jammed in the socket? I'm glad she got her sight back and all, but ugh!— September 29, 2009 1:44 a.m.
Polanski Children Center -- Celebrity Idiots in the News
I was just reading about a movement afoot in some European countries to lower the age of consent. It wasn't clear from the story whether this would only apply to minors having sex with each other, or whether it would also apply to one having sex with an adult. But Polanski is probably saying "See, I was just ahead of my time".— September 28, 2009 11:58 p.m.
Diving (not driving) with Golf Balls
How do you die diving in a golf course pond? WTF?— September 28, 2009 11:52 p.m.
Furry Children
Captain Gringo looked across the bar. He didn't like the way Smelly Pete was looking at him. He'd never liked Smelly Pete, and this seemed like as good a day as any to do something about it. "Ignore him", pleaded mSDaniels, the hostess of Veronica's Armpit, he's harmless. "Maybe so" said Captain Gringo, "but I just don't like his face".— September 27, 2009 1:01 a.m.
Furry Children
Wow, russl, great minds think alike.— September 27, 2009 12:54 a.m.
Furry Children
Pirates! Can't go wrong with pirates!— September 27, 2009 12:53 a.m.
Furry Children
Little did Veronica know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anudrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. Earth was a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who had been observing, and were now determined to destroy the human race. The Anudrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Veronica.— September 26, 2009 11:26 p.m.
Stove on Fire
"After gaining her composure and smoking a cigarette, she complained to a neighbor, “The firemen put a big-ass hole in the wall and kicked in my door.” As I pick myself up off the floor from laughing, it occurs to me she'll probably sue the city, which will settle rather than pay the legal fees. Ah, what a great country we live in.— September 26, 2009 11:18 p.m.
It Takes a Village and 19 Months
Shizzy, nice observations on the Walmart-shopping average American: "Stacks of DVDs, each DVD watched only once? Rarely used exercise equipment? Decorative pillows?" It's what passes for wealth in today's society. Accumulating unnecessary "stuff". One might add the item bought off the TV after the infomercial convinced you you had to have it, then used once and forgotten.— September 26, 2009 11:12 p.m.