beermonkey
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City of Steel Churches
This piece is a nice follow-up to "Doña Quiote" which utterly amazed me! Kid, you have talent far beyond your years. Truly, you are one gifted young lady. Keep writing. Even if it makes your sanity slip. I read "Doña Quiote" several times 'cos I was dazzled! Most people your age can't think past 140 characters let alone write with such eloquence and flow. It's kids like you that give me hope.— April 18, 2011 9:40 p.m.
One Ugly Thirst
First; Cuddle, Refried, nan, Grant and SD; thank you all very much for your technical help and compliments! You guys are awesome! And SD, if that's your pic, you're an absolute doll! Placa, thanks for the correction in your first point. I don't know how missed that. I totally spaced. I'll correct it right now. But, I have no idea why you would get the sense I was trying to be humorous. What kind of comedy have you been reading? Let me explain something to you: IT"S A STORY. It's fiction designed to make folks think and generate emotion. While I do have some experience with binge drinking, it's nothing like that of the character in the short. And I've never been booted from Beachcomber or snapped because of the loud people downtown. Oh, and I don't own a condo in the Gaslamp... or a liquor cabinet... or a gun. So chill out, homie! You're scaring me!— June 29, 2010 12:37 a.m.
One Ugly Thirst
Hey! You guys just don't understand! I accidently posted that 'cos I'm still trying to figure out how to save a draft, and that was a test save– not intended to be posted! How, oh how, do I delete it? I write in a spiral bound notebook, in pencil. Then I transcribe the text onto the screen as I edit. And I'm very technologically challenged. So quit making fun! You guys are mean! Help me instead. Once I get this right, you'll be blown away by this story.— June 25, 2010 9:09 a.m.
Fans Staying Away from Away at the Park
Yeah? Well people downtown vilify the homeless like they're al-Queda. Anytime an issue comes up about downtown events, people complain the about attracting the homeless instead of coming up with solutions to the problems of economic disparity and lack of public services. To address Surf's question, I've heard from reliable sources that Padre home game attendance is the lowest ever at Petco. We can attribute that to the unfortunate fact that our team sucks, very few fans are loyal, and the economy's in the tank.— June 29, 2009 10:52 a.m.
Let’s Toast to Banning Booze
Sorry for the furlough, but I've been busy PARTYING MY BUTT OFF in celebration of the Laker championship. As for running for council, I don't think I can beat Sam Assmann. He's got more than a leg up on me, not to mention my vote. And yes, SD, magic friggin' wands. My description was hyperbolic, but the fundamentals are true. I think they already started a similar program up in Del Mar or somewhere. If anyone out there knows, pray tell. Aldous echoes a friend of mine's sentiments. She suggests a city issued license to drink available to anyone who can prove they were born in So Cal. (I think she means born in San Diego County, but expanded the geographical boundaries for my benefit so as not to offend.) I couldn't agree more with Aldous. We pay the taxes, support the businesses and keep the watchful eye on our towns. Too bad the proposal would reek havoc on those trying to enforce it (the drinking part, that is; the parking enforcement would be easy). It is fair and just and does not allow for the rich to privatize the commons, but rather the locals to reap the benefits of citizenship. Too bad most of City Council's in the pockets of the big out of town developers, otherwise we could bring this idea up in front of them. One last solid point: the locals are already home; so when they drink, they don't have to drive home. Ahh, but logic like that falls on deaf ears when dealing with birdbrains. Aldous, which biblical Book is that from? I must confess: I was born in LA.— June 19, 2009 5:22 p.m.
Let’s Toast to Banning Booze
Yeah, SD, just don't bring the Ann Coulter clips; that'll cause a group suicide. And don't give away any tricks of the trade about our continued habit of beach boozin'. I heard soon they're gonna be runnin' around with magic wands that can detect a cup of vodka and OJ in front of Hamel's all the way from Crystal Pier. But you're right; we don't get caught 'cos we're pro's. And if we do want to get rowdy, we go to the Bayside where I've not seen one person who gives a damn since the Bush 1 Administration. Ain't it a bitch? One little incident made the CNN, and people acted like the whole town was a Prohibition era speakeasy. And two years later, us sane folk are STILL gripin' about it. Makes me wanna fill up my dummy oxygen tank with ICE COLD BEER and go get drunk on the seawall! Up yours, Faulkner! You can't stop beermonkey!!— June 10, 2009 6:57 p.m.
She's Got Great Cans
Yeah, this one's a hit. It's makes me wanna read more of it. This one flows like good fiction. Like if I didn't know you, I'd think you were making it up. You could use it as a set-up for all kinds of crazy. I think you should do that. Make some stuff up about wacky characters and put in more references to places people know. And of course I gotta love your reference old school MB. Your insights and observations about $ and how different people handle it differently make this quite pertinent for the times.— June 9, 2009 10:33 p.m.
Let’s Toast to Banning Booze
I am the famous beermonkey, winner of last October's blog contest. All drunks bow to me! And all immigrant bashing right wingers like DS, who foolishly tried to debate me in the "Letters" section last month, are crushed like cucarachas! Burwell should go live in some Muslim country where alcohol is banned. We'd all be better off. And, speaking of ban, screw the ban! I drink on the beach anyway. Double-talkers like Faulkner can't stop me! I'm the beer monkey, damn it! Ever since the ban, the cops are hardly visible at the beach; the East Coast knuckle heads stay home and play beer pong; and I get to drink my beer in peace! Yes, folks, the ice luge and kegger days may be gone; but so is my youth. Tanks for the mammeries! Fact: the Wavehouse was the biggest contributor to the Prop D Propaganda. Stay outta there! Long live the Coaster, (I love you Darinda and Torrie.) Sandbar, Guava and Open Bar! Que Viva Cerveza! Long live beermonkey! See you at Gaslamp Tavern!— June 9, 2009 2:56 p.m.
The Ambassador of Goodwill
K, A fine piece of uplifting journalism. Your words flow, and you remain consistent with your punctuation. I'm sure Lawrence and his fans appreciate your work. For that reason alone, you should feel proud in your contribution to the community and the "Reader."— June 9, 2009 2:06 p.m.