Sweet merciful crap! Through means I’d rather not discuss, I’ve managed to transport myself back to the Mesozoic period. The dishwasher and eight-track cassette player I used as a time vehicle is now broken. Even …

Album: Homeland Security (2008) Artist: Nature of the Beast Label: self-released Where available/price: Access Hip Hop in Pacific Beach for $10.95 (CD and vinyl), CDBaby.com for $10.99 (CD) and $5.50 (vinyl), iTunes for $9.99 (download), …

Name: Steve Reed Age: 26 Surfing: La Jolla Lives in: South Park Pre-surf food: Nachos and beer Celebrity most like to surf with: Tony Danza “I love surfing at Mission Beach, but I really hate …

"Huevos con Queso," by Agave, was the most downloaded MP3 from our website in October. Below is an interview with the band’s primary songwriter, Rusty Bishop. What is it about Mexico that musicians — especially …

My roommate wandered in while I was watching a movie on TV. We’re still settling into our new place and she was retrieving and placing things in what she determined were their new proper spots. …

We’ve focused so exclusively on the election that I’m unsure I’ll know what to do with myself when it’s over. I write this two days before The Tuesday, the incredibly important Tuesday, the Tuesday two …

Album: It’s About Time (2008) Artist: Plane Without a Pilot Label: Rdub Recordings Where available/price: iTunes, CDBaby.com, Lou’s Records in Encinitas, Taang! Records, Music Trader, Thirsty Moon Records, Off the Record in North Park, M-Theory …

Name: Michael Woodbury Age: 29 Lives in: Chula Vista Occupation: Video-game designer Post-Surf Food: Spicy bean burrito Girls in the Water: “No…I mean, yes.” Michael tends to avoid the beaches in the summertime. “I don’t …

It sat there, not ominous or inimical, but mysterious. The TV. I’ve moved in with a roommate to save some money this year and to shed my old barrio. My roommate has a TV big …

Album: Plastic, Fake, and Frozen (2007) Artist: The Apes of Wrath Label: self-released Where available/price: At M-Theory in Mission Hills for $6.99. Online at Amazon for $6.23; Emusic and Rhapsody.com for $6.83. Band: Jake Bankhead …

George W. Bush is an American hero, and let me tell you why: because if he can make it, anyone can. All it takes is money. Look at him. That stiff Porky Pig impression every …

Like a donkey on a tilt-a-whirl, I have no business being in a kitchen. With that in mind, I’m going to share some of my cost-cutting-cooking and home-organizing tips. First, what you want to do …

“Drive America,” by the Cathryn Beeks Ordeal, was the most-downloaded MP3 from SDReader.com during September. Below is an interview with songwriter Cathryn Beeks. What was the best road trip you’ve taken, and how did the …

Name: Neil Salunga Age: 29 Occupation: Firefighter Lives in: San Ysidro Pre-surf music: N.W.A. Girls in the water?: “Total distraction.” Neil Salunga recounts the experience of getting attacked by a shark: “A year ago, I …

Album: Crime Desire (2007) Artist: Crime Desire Label: self-released on Life’s a Rape Records Where available/price: Lou’s Records in Encinitas for $10; online at myspace.com/crimedesire for $10. Songs: 1) Untitled 2) Succubus 3) Nadir 4) …

Waiting for Sarah Palin’s appearance at the vice-presidential debates was like waiting for one of those predator crab things to latch onto my face and lay eggs in my mouth. Something horrible was on its …

Name: Matt Fielder Age: 27 Lives In: Ocean Beach Occupation: Actor Pre-Surf Music: Tone Loc Girls in the Water?: “Yes, please!” Matt has been surfing since he was seven years old. He grew up in …

Good lord, I need to get out of this slum. While watching TV the other night, a knock came at my screen door. “Does José live here?” the man said, pointing down to indicate he …

Album: Mike Pinto (2007) Artist: Mike Pinto Label: self-released Songs: 1) Full Speed 2) Surf Tune 3) Addictions 4) Backburner 5) Get Me Down 6) Temptation 7) Bad Luck 8) Knocked Up 9) Never Hold …

As my superhero alter ego, Narcoleptic Dingo, I plan to attack Washington and Wall Street. Sure, sure, the trio of supervillains, Fedsy McMoneychanger, the Tax Reaper, and Bendover Herecomesthe-porkbarrelspending Monster will try to confuse me …

Since one of my ex-girlfriend’s ideas of the most fun one could have was to sprinkle red wine about my bedroom floor, I decided I needed to rent a carpet cleaner and turn my burgundy …

Name: Jack Turner Age: 23 Occupation: Personal Trainer Lives In: Jamul Surfing: Scripps Favorite Surf Movie: Point Break Jack blamed his “surf karma” for his inability to catch a wave a couple weeks ago. “So, …

Herpes simplex A through Q saw fit to land on my face and create a tiny ecosystem of interconnecting blisters and communities. I’m going to give it to John McCain. (I already gave it to …

Below is an interview with Tiltwheel songwriter Davey “Tiltwheel” Quinn, who penned "I Spent My Spring Break in Vancouver and All I Got Was This Dumb Song" — SDReader.com’s most downloaded mp3 during the month …

Name: Gretchen Kauffman Age: 25 Occupation: Technical designer for Reef Been Surfing: Five years Pre-Surf Music: Slightly Stoopid Gretchen, an O.B. resident, has just experienced her first bit of sexism on the beach. “This guy …

I busted my damn foot. I was in ninja school; we were practicing that throw-the-egg-full-of-explosive-powder-down-and-disappear thing when the new guy in the purple sweats disappeared in the wrong direction and stomped my foot. “WAAAAA!” I …

Obama picked me to be vice president! And I picked Kermit the Frog to serve as my vice vice president, along with undersecretary Michael Phelps. Our first order of business will be to stage Kermit’s …

Album: Fretfull (2008) Artist: Wayne Riker Label: self-released Where available/price: Old Time Music Shop in North Park, Tecolote Guitar Works on Morena Boulevard, and online at CDBaby for $15 Songs: 1) The Betrayal 2) 8 …

Name: Yiga Miyashiro Age: 25 Lives In: O.B. Occupation: Professional brewer Favorite Surf Movie: Endless Summer Favorite Local Surf Spot: Black’s Yiga, who has surfed since he was eight, braves the crowds for a Saturday-morning …

Here I sit, hunched over my pad of yellow stickies and pile of inconsequential receipts, my crayon poised in shaking fingers, and I’m livid. I write this to you in Crayola “Brick” on the reverse …

Amber Ojeda’s “Don’t Rush” was the most-downloaded MP3 during July. What’s your favorite moment in “Don’t Rush”? Amber Ojeda: The hook is my favorite part of the song. It reminds me to stay grounded and …

Nobody's ever asked the question "What if a vampire and a zombie were trapped together in a sealed room?" Until now. You see, here at stately Underpants Manor we're gigglingly wealthy, curious, and a little …

I look like the most reviled creature on Earth, and I’ll tell you what it is: an Ewok. If you don’t hate Ewoks, you’re not paying attention. And don’t give me that “you said ‘the …

Name: Dusty Engel Age: 30 Occupation: High School Math Teacher Lives: La Mesa Surfing: Dog Beach Girls in the Water? “Wish there were more!” “On a big day, I get crushed by waves,” admits Dusty …

Here at Tablecloth Cape Studios we strive to stay ahead of the competition. While other news outlets blather on about sunscreen, we’re going to stuff stale bread up a turkey’s chute and call it the …

Album: Cowley Road (2008) Artist: Gayle Skidmore Label: self-released Where available/price: At live shows for $10; online at iTunes for 99 cents per downloaded song. Songs: 1) Cheap Imitation 2) Just for Now 3) Still …

The two most embarrassing elements of my existence are (1) I enjoy girl folk music, and (2) I occasionally wake up, still drunk from the night before, on the bedroom floors of complete strangers, reeking …

Name: Dick Vegas Age: 44 (“...and a whole lot more.”) Occupation: Actor Lives In: Linda Vista Surfing: O.B. Jetty Pre-Surf Music: Led Zeppelin “I came out here 22 years ago, and a bunch of my …

Its internal workings comprise several kludgy elements. Inside it are: the wiring of a movie time bomb that forces my coffeemaker to count down from ten seconds over the span of half an hour, a …

“Paper Box,” by Gayle Skidmore, was the most-downloaded MP3 during June. Each month we will highlight the most popular tune by featuring an interview with the songwriter. What’s your favorite part of “Paper Box”? Gayle …

Name: Nathan Kruger Age: 26 Lives In: La Mesa Surfing: Scripps Pre-Surf Music: The Get Up Kids Girls in the Water? “Definite yay!” “I just have to say that I’m really tired of the ‘locals …

“Que mas?” the girl said, swishing her black hair over her ear. "Que mas?" She turned from me, held her arms above her head, and rocked her hips. She pulled her hair up off her …

Album: 7s (2008) Artist: Nautical Disaster Label: self-released Where available/price: Live shows for $8. M-Theory, Off the Record, and Lou’s Records for $8.99. Online at CDBaby for $10.97; iTunes and Amazon for $8.91 (or 99 …

All through elementary school, my classmates and I were treated to instructions, both live and on VHS tape, detailing what we should do if we caught on fire. That’s right, kids. Say it with me: …

Half of a “nutrition bar” sat before me on the wobbly café table. I couldn’t eat the rest because it was oily yet granular but also couldn’t force myself to throw it out. I had …

Like an elderly pet, my television shows signs of physical and mental decline. And not one of those throwaway pets like a county-fair goldfish; no, my TV is a loyal Weimaraner, so noble. Now she’s …

Name: Erick Castaneda Age: 27 Lives In: North Park Surfing: Tourmaline Pre-Surf Music: The Adolescents Post-Surf Food: Breakfast burrito Erick “Carne” Castaneda says, “I used to be sponsored with P.B. Surf Shop when I was …

The city is a procrustean bed for man’s wildness. His heart and eyes disfavor straight line and timidity. Children know this. Set a child down on grass, and he’ll strip his shirt off, pick a …

Album: Yippee!!! (2008) Artist: Hotel St. George Label: self-released Where available/price: Taang! Records downtown, Thirsty Moon in Hillcrest, and M-Theory Records in Mission Hills for $8 Songs: 1) Old Lies Told Well 2) It’s the …

Name: Jamie Nelan Age: 23 Lives In: P.B. Surfing: P.B. Drive Pre-Surf Music: Muse Post-Surf Food: California burrito “I lived in Australia in my junior year of college,” says Jamie, “and when I was there …