Lord Matt of Knowledge: There are ongoing rumors suggesting that [British] Prince Harry has issues. Or, more precisely, he isn't Charles's issue. Does anyone concerned with the succession to the throne see anything in these …
August 17, 2000
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Stories by Matthew Alice
Are any of the rumors concerning British Prince Harry true?
How do you get permission from Caltrans to put up memorial markers between the 163 and 52 overpass?
Hey, Matt: I commute to work by bike down Kearny Villa Road, and between the 163 overpass and the 52 overpass are two markers, one on each side of the road. The west side marker …
August 3, 2000
Can you please answer this puzzle for me?
Mr. Alice: This puzzle has been driving me crazy. So there are three guys in a hotel and they order a pizza. It costs $30. Each guy chips in $10. But when the pizza delivery …
August 3, 2000
Why are prime-time network TV shows shown at different times, depending on the time zone?
Hey, Matt: Why are prime-time network TV shows shown at one time in the Eastern and Pacific time zones and another time in the Central and Mountain time zones? -- Phil Collins, Oceanside Heymatt: Why …
July 27, 2000
Is it legal for people to leave paper advertisements at your house when ever they feel like it?
Matthew: What's the scoop on the stuff that pitches up on my doorstep while I'm away from home? Flyers inviting me to try bottled water free for 30 days or take advantage of two-fer-one pizza …
July 13, 2000
Can a person still get dandruff if they shave their head?
Hey, Matt: If a person shaves their head, can they still get dandruff? -- Slap-head, UTC Technically, yes. That's using the broadest definition of "dandruff," of course -- flakes of dead skin breaking free of …
July 13, 2000
How does the money from CRV move through the system?
Dear Matt: I have no problem with the CRV we Californians pay for beverage containers as it is really nothing more than a deposit for our glass, cans, and plastic containers. My grocery clerk collects …
July 13, 2000
Is it true that limestone from the great pyramids of Egypt was used to build high-rise buildings in Cairo?
Dear Matt: The wife and I saw The Mummy the other night. It brought back a fact I learned sometime in my life that I wonder is true. Is it true that limestone from the …
July 6, 2000
Should I leave a tip when I eat at a restaurant and served by the proprietor?
Mr Alice: XXXXX Should I leave a tip when I eat at a restaurant and am served by the proprietor XXXX or his wife? I can see tipping a waitress who works for the owner …
July 6, 2000
What cartoon character used the phrase, "I hate those meeses to pieces?"
To my good fellow: What cartoon character used the phrase "I hate those meeses to pieces"? It's driving me nuts! Also, where did the phrase "Waiting around till the last dog is hung" come from.... …
July 6, 2000
When you are driving through the desert, how can there be a reflection of something in a mirage?
Matthew: When you're driving through the desert and it's hot, you sometimes see what looks like a big pool of water in the road ahead of you. I know this is a mirage and that …
June 29, 2000
Could there be foxes in the canyon near the College Area or City Heights?
Dear Matt A: When I lived near a canyon in the College Area, there was often a very coarse howl, almost a growl coming from the canyon, often followed by a shrill whistle. Furthermore, it …
June 29, 2000
How long will a ball of gum stay in your stomach?
Matthew Alice: My four-year-old has just mastered the art of chewing gum. He can eat a whole pack in ten minutes. I don't think swallowing five pieces of Bubble Yum will hurt him, but it …
June 22, 2000
What is the deal with castrati singers?
Hey, Matt, Whazzup: What is the deal with castrati singers? I first thought this only happened back in the baroque period, but recently I was listening to an actual recording of one in a history …
June 22, 2000
Are there any statistics indicating a relationship between crime and the weather?
Dear Matthew Alice: Lately I've gotten calls from around the country from people wanting to know if San Diego's good weather has something to do with our falling crime rate. I have to tell them …
June 8, 2000
Why is there a sign at the Grand/Garnet split in PB that says "La Jolla," with an arrow pointing south?
Dear Matthew Alice: There's a sign east of the intersection of Grand and Garnet in Pacific Beach that shows with an arrow that La Jolla is to the left (onto Grand) with another arrow to …
June 8, 2000
Has anyone ever attempted to make honey artificially, rather than messing around with dangerous, ill-tempered bees?
Matt: It is my understanding that bees make honey by evaporating the liquid component of nectar that they have collected. This sounds so simple. I have been wondering if anyone has ever attempted to duplicate …
June 8, 2000
Is McDonald's really the largest purchaser of cow eyeballs?
Dear Matt: Is McDonald's really the largest purchaser of cow eyeballs? -- Jason, Mission Beach Yeah, I know I said I'd had my fill of obvious urban legends. But with this tall tale I figured, …
May 25, 2000
What the heck is the female announcer saying on the Baja, California Mexico commercial?
Hey, Matt: I keep hearing what I think is a commercial in a foreign language on several of the local radio stations. It goes something like this. "Icky, socky, ramey, afamey, Baja California, Mexico." What …
May 25, 2000
Have you ever heard of rats chewing the wiring in a car engine?
Dear Matt A: Have you ever heard of rats chewing the wiring in a car engine? Rats are eating my car! What I'm wondering is, why are they doing it and how can I stop …
May 25, 2000
What is the meaning of "CE?"
Dear Matt: Every once in a while I run across a rather cryptic notation, this being a "CE" inscribed on a product in a rather curly, Phoenician-type script. I've seen this on everything from Vuarnet …
May 18, 2000
What is the meaning behind "simulated picture," referring to ads for television sets?
Hey, Matt: In newspaper ads for television sets I often see, in tiny print, "simulated picture" or something to that effect. Is there some obscure consumer law that requires the notation? -- Verve, the Net …
May 18, 2000
Why is it that every time I go through the airport metal detector, the buzzer goes off and I am taken aside and checked by a hand detector?
Dear Matthew Alice: Every time I go through the airport metal detector, the buzzer goes off and I am taken aside and checked by a hand detector. I am ordered to empty my pockets, which …
May 11, 2000
How many players have played major-league baseball since the beginning of time?
Dear Matt: Please help us. A die-hard baseball fan and I have a dispute to settle, and we know only you (and the elves) can help. How many players have played major-league baseball since the …
May 11, 2000
Is it true that ancient Egyptians circumcised slaves?
Dear Matt: I have read that ancient Egyptians circumcised slaves. Moses kept the practice to remind Hebrews of that episode. I have also read that Egyptian rulers practiced the same rite. Are you knowledgeable if …
May 11, 2000
Is it true that there used to be a town at the bottom of Lake Hodges?
Matthew: I like to fish Lake Hodges, and a pal told me that somewhere at the bottom of the lake there is a town that existed before they built the dam. Is this a fish …
May 4, 2000
What would be the proper way to pronounce a computer mouse plural- mice or mouses?
Heymatt: I was at Office Depot the other day and felt like a fool for asking them where there "mice" were, as in a mouse for a computer. Is there a way to pluralize this, …
May 4, 2000
Do convicts still make our license plates?
Dear Matt: Do convicts still make our license plates, or was that all a big story told to us by our mothers? -- Charlie B., San Diego I see the cars a-comin', Rollin' 'round the …
May 4, 2000
Why do digital things bounce up and down when you eat something crunchy and other things do not?
Dear Matthew Alice: Try this: Eat something crunchy (such as corn chips) while staring at a digital clock (such as on a microwave). The numbers bounce up and down! Why is this? And why don't …
April 27, 2000
Why do planes flash their lights before landing?
Oh, All-Knowing One: I live in the flight path of Lindbergh Field in South Park (I love saying that), and I was wondering. Sometimes planes will flash their lights when approaching. Is it because there …
April 27, 2000
How sanitary is money?
Dear Matt: How sanitary is the money that passes through our hands every day? I recently got some change back at the store, and one bill appeared to be spattered with blood. I was reminded …
April 20, 2000
Are the parking meters near Seaport Village run by the Port District?
Matthew Alice: Saw these parking meters near Seaport Village. They blink red when expired. This is Port District property. How unusual. What gives? -- Downtown Sam, downtown (where else?) Jetted down there hoping for a …
April 20, 2000
Are there more earthquakes now than there were 60 years ago?
Dear Matthew Alice: I've enclosed an ad from the San Diego Union-Tribune which provides "8 Compelling Reasons Why: Christ Is Coming Very Soon!" I'm interested in your take on Item 4, which states, "A recent …
April 20, 2000
Is there adhesive in paint?
Heymatt: My silly friend D says there is adhesive in paint. I think that is ridiculous! I read your column in the Reader today and thought you might know. What do you think? -- Groverg1rl, …
April 13, 2000
There is an English Planetarium, circa 1810, is it accurate?
Matmail: I went to the Reuben H. Fleet Science Center for my birthday, and I noticed something odd. Upstairs they have, in a glass case, what they call "English Planetarium, circa 1810." It's really nice, …
April 13, 2000
Who picks up after guide dogs for the blind?
Hi, All-Knowing One: Who picks up after guide dogs for the blind? Does the dog's blind master carry a pooper-scooper or plastic Baggie? If so, how do they know where the waste matter is located? …
April 13, 2000
Does KFC use test tube chickens?
Heymatt: One of my loopier friends, Brian Kitlinger, claims that Kentucky Fried Chicken uses genetically engineered "tube chickens" instead of real chickens for their tasty meals. Since Brian puts such faith in your wisdom, could …
March 30, 2000
If water finds its own level, can you explain the need for the Panama canal?
Dear Matthew Alice: Who do I turn to when no one else has the answer? You, of course. Water finds its own level, right? RIGHT! Then explain the need for the Panama Canal. Except for …
March 30, 2000
What is the Yellow Rose seen from Highway 94 about?
Hello, Matt: Thanks for taking my call. First-time caller; long-time listener. What's the story on the sculpture of a large, single yellow rose on the western outskirts of Lemon Grove? The sculpture in question is …
March 23, 2000
How many variations are there of the fast-food Mexican restaurant Roberto's?
Dear Matthew: How many variations are there of the fast-food Mexican restaurant Roberto's in San Diego County? I've seen Royberto's and Humberto's, to name a couple. Is there any relation between the various mutations? -- …
March 16, 2000
How many spiders do you eat at night when you are sleeping?
Hey, Matt: About a year ago on the radio there was a call-in trivia question that went something like this. "Every year, the average person eats four of these in their sleep." The answer was …
March 9, 2000
Who are the Gideons?
Dear Matt: Who are the Gideons? Are they a cult? How do they get the Bibles into the hotel rooms without anyone seeing them? Are they ninjas or something? Should I be scared of them …
March 9, 2000
Do you get more wet by walking or running in the rain?
Hey, Matt: This has been a puzzle to me for a long time. Since it has been raining lately, I'd appreciate your help. How do you stay drier, by walking through the rain so the …
March 2, 2000
What is the 80/20 theory?
Mattman: I find the 80/20 rule to be very useful and applicable to many situations I run into. A friend once told me who came up with this concept and the name of the book …
March 2, 2000
Could you tell me why, since "I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die," I'm stuck in Folsom prison, in California?
Dear Matthew Alice: Could you tell me why, since "I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die," I'm stuck in Folsom prison, in California? -- J. Cash, San Diego The true episode …
March 2, 2000
What causes the "pop" when you pop your back?
Matt, you ignorant slut: I've talked to various experts about what makes the popping sound when you crack your back, and I've gotten a different definitive answer from each of them. So much for expertise …
February 24, 2000
Who cleans up after car accidents?
Matthew: What's up with the broken glass on the roads after accidents? Whose job is it to clean up the mess? I've seen glass left in intersections near the beaches, Balboa Park, downtown, etc. I …
February 17, 2000
What is the difference between 100% juice and less than 100% juice?
Dear Matthew Alice: I am puzzled by the labels on jars of fruit juice. Some boast that they contain 100% juice, while others state they are 25 to 35% juice. Yet upon examining the ingredients, …
February 17, 2000
What is going on with the house in Allied Gardens at the I-8 exit?
Matt: Growing up in Allied Gardens, it was hard not to notice this funny little '50s-style tract house standing on its own at the bottom of Waring Road, right next to the exit to I-8 …
February 17, 2000
Why are bowling shoes always the same wherever you go, and why are they so ugly?
Dear Matthew Alice: I've been a bowler for more than 40 years. And it's only last week that it finally hit me. Why are bowling shoes always the same wherever you go, and why are …
February 10, 2000