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Stories by Josh Board

Best of Crasher, 2005

Pee Wee and Me "Julia" was always one of my favorite Beatles ballads. Now it would be one of my favorite party people. She called to invite me to her Pee Wee Herman party. I …

June 25, 2016
Happy Holly Daze

I went to a huge Christmas party a couple of weeks ago at the University Heights home of Liz Abbott and Kent Johnson. They publish the San Diego Troubadour — a local paper that covers …

January 6, 2010
Lofty, Bizarre

A woman named Cynthia was having a birthday party downtown. I was told we were supposed to bring something, so I bought cupcakes at the store. When I arrived downtown, I parked far away from …

December 23, 2009
Ho-Ho-How About a Cookie?

I found out from a friend with a six-year-old son that one of his playmates has a mom who throws elaborate Christmas parties. I drove up to Kimberley’s condo in Peñasquitos, and from there we …

December 16, 2009
Star Power

I was able to hit two parties recently because one involved a student film festival, and the kiddies don’t usually party into the late hours. The event, a fundraiser at Isabel’s Cantina in P.B., was …

December 9, 2009
Amy Wallen Will Give You Crickets

As I drove by the Swedenborgian Church around the corner from my place in Normal Heights, I saw people entering for some event that included balloons and a huge cake. It was a safe assumption …

December 2, 2009
Who You Callin' Chicken?

I headed to La Mesa for a 40th birthday party. The first thing I noticed was the cake in the backyard: it was shaped like a huge Patrón tequila bottle. A woman named Juana told …

November 24, 2009
Halloween Police

Halloween was a complete nightmare for me. I had three parties lined up and the easiest costume in Halloween history. My girlfriend had ordered a Kate Gosselin wig and goofy big sunglasses for herself. I …

November 18, 2009
Tipsy and Talkative

I get invited to a number of pub-crawls. I’m not a beer drinker and usually pass. But a guy named Steve, who logged on to the Reader website once to comment on a party, informed …

November 11, 2009
Gypsies, Snacks, and “Steve”

I collect vintage radios, phonographs, and jukeboxes, so I go to O.B.’s antique stores a few times a year. A few weeks ago, in the early afternoon, I went down to Newport Avenue for an …

October 28, 2009
San Diego, Las Vegas

Someone on the Reader website clued me in to a Las Vegas–themed party going down in North Park. I’m glad they did. The small backyard was packed with Vegas-style games and a detached room that …

October 21, 2009
Friends Are Like Jewels

I was walking my dog around University Heights and saw a party setting up at a house near Adams Avenue. I dropped my dog off and headed back over. I walked in and a few …

October 14, 2009
No Pictures, Dude

In L.A. at an autograph and collectors’ convention, I smiled at Playboy Playmate Candy Clark as I walked by her table. She was charging $25 for her autograph. I glanced at her price list and …

October 7, 2009
L.A. Stories

When radio station KPRI announced a Van Morrison concert in L.A. that they’d be taking listeners to, I talked my way into joining afternoon DJ Oz in the limo to the show. We picked up …

September 30, 2009
Shotski!

I went to a pool party in San Marcos in August that began with a morning visit to a Stone Brewing Company beerfest. I showed up after everyone had made it back to Heidi’s house. …

September 23, 2009
Mutt Mixer

My girlfriend told a coworker who was going out of town for two weeks that she’d watch her dog for her. As we were walking the woman’s yellow Lab through downtown streets, we noticed a …

Crest Burgers

When I checked my voice mail to see if anyone called in a party, I heard there was a barbecue in Crest, so off I went. Marilyn had a big house with a pool in …

September 2, 2009
Dangerous Bird

I ran into Nick Simmons, the son of Kiss bassist Gene, at Comic-Con. I told him I caught the episode of his reality show on which he sang. I told him he had a good …

Pile-Drivin' Tacos

A Mexican wrestler was pictured on the invitation to a party I went to a month ago. The card was for John’s 40th birthday “smackdown,” and I had to be “ready to rumble.” The thought …

August 19, 2009
Sell It, Trade It, Keep It

I love autograph stories. When a friend found out I wrote for Autograph Magazine, he told me about a guy he knows who runs an art gallery in North Park. This guy’s mother sewed clothing …

August 19, 2009
Golding's Grudge

I was having a rough patch in crashing some events. It started with Comic-Con. Organizers refused to give me a press pass because something I wrote on the Reader website last year bothered them. I …

August 12, 2009
Salsa Susie, Tango Tony

On the same weekend last month, I went to two dance parties. One was for a salsa dancer who turned 40. The locale, in P.B., was decorated with pictures of him. A DJ played salsa …

August 5, 2009
Beckett No, Hendrix Yes

A handful of the people who post on the Reader website planned a get-together. I think it stemmed from one of them being in town from Washington state. They agreed to meet downtown at The …

July 29, 2009
Something to Smile About

Mahsa graduated from La Costa Canyon this year, and her mom threw a party for her at a pizzeria in Encinitas. I showed up late and there was only one place to sit, next to …

July 15, 2009
Punk Politesse

A woman in the Serra Mesa area was turning 21. I got an invite to her birthday party from her mom. When I arrived, the birthday girl’s mom was cooking tacos for the crowd. I …

July 1, 2009
The Lakers vs. Luna Llena

I drove up to Oceanside for a surprise party that Wayne was throwing for his wife’s birthday. I squeezed into a spot on the street, slightly blocking the driveway of a nearby neighbor. I could …

June 24, 2009
Family Banding

Mid-May, after a show at Canes, Rhythm and the Method lead singer Rhythm Turner was saying goodbye to her girlfriend when she was attacked. Her dad, Papa Shawn, is a guitarist in Rhythm and the …

June 17, 2009
Jack and Duke and Tiffany

About a month ago, I drove to El Cajon for an annual horseshoe tournament in memory of Jack and Duke, two deceased friends of the organizers. When Chris called to tell me about it, he …

June 17, 2009
Swift Serenade

Luke Walton, an 18-year-old Carlsbad resident and recent graduate of La Costa Canyon High, is getting popular because of a song he sort of wrote, a love song for Taylor Swift. He posted it on …

June 17, 2009
A Chihuahua Named Wanda

Nothing better than an afternoon party on a sunny day with barbecue and a live band. At this house in Kensington, they were cooking up chicken, burgers, and bacon-wrapped asparagus and artichoke hearts. I walked …

June 10, 2009
Sorry, Charley

I was given detailed directions on how to get to Charley’s party. He was graduating from Cal State San Marcos. But the beachfront condos in Oceanside, where he lives, all had gates I couldn’t get …

Adam's Run

I’ve had two Thanksgiving dinners with Eber Lambert, father of American Idol Adam. Last November, before we all sat down to eat, Eber was doing a lot of texting. He said, “My son just made …

June 3, 2009
I Would Drive 100 Miles

I covered a hundred miles driving to three different parties on one recent Saturday. The first party was up in Murrieta. I would’ve blown it off, but it was for an old high school friend …

Fowl Play in Fallbrook

There are lots of local film festivals, but Fallbrook’s is my favorite. This year’s second annual started on Thursday, April 23, but it wasn’t until Saturday afternoon that my girlfriend and I made it. We …

May 13, 2009
From Parlor to Parking Lot

Alison Brown went from playing banjo outside of Shakey’s Pizza in La Mesa to performing with Alison Krauss + Union Station, being named the Banjo Player of the Year by the International Bluegrass Music Association, …

May 13, 2009
Skullcrusher and Vaporizer

Chad teaches at SDSU and lives in the Clairemont area. He threw a party for his 30th birthday about a month ago. I brought a few women with me. We stopped and bought some booze …

May 6, 2009
Australian Rules

In late March, I went to a park in Hillcrest for a going-away party. People there dubbed the theme “crokaoke” because they were playing croquet and singing karaoke. The guest of honor was a local …

Reader writers' favorite drinks and where they drink them

There are times, sometimes in the midst of otherwise polite conversation, when it comes out that I make my living writing for the Reader. The follow-up to this revelation is almost never “Oh, that’s right, …

April 22, 2009
Cold Clues, Hot Shaves

About a month ago, I went to the opening of a music store in El Cajon called Guitar and Bass Land. A guy was talking about how he plays bass in a Dio tribute band. …

April 22, 2009
Margaritas at Canes

-1-1/2 oz. tequila -1 oz. triple sec -Margarita mix -Sweetened lime juice -Splash of orange juice Some people sound so damn cool ordering their drink. “Martini. Shaken, not stirred.” Or they know which vintage of …

April 22, 2009
Four People, No Laughs

I fit a couple of parties into one night. Both were at bars. Well, the first wasn’t really at a bar, per se. It was in the cantina of Fidel’s in Solana Beach. I was …

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