Diary of a Diva
David’s parents seemed surprised when, upon entering their house, David remarked, “So, Riley got skunked again, huh?” “How did you know zat?” Ency asked. “What do you mean, how did — I can smell it,” …
David and I braced ourselves for the nippy, nighttime New England air as we stepped off the ferry and onto the ramp, headed toward the luggage cart. It was 10:30 p.m. on Martha’s Vineyard, more …
A squawky, unintelligible, robot voice emanated from my phone — my latest ring tone. When I answered, my sister Heather said, “Well, I guess you need to let me know what night is good for …
I don’t usually listen to voicemail left by robots, but this one was from my health-insurance company, so I stayed on the line long enough to jot down the 800 number I was instructed to …
You’d think I’d remember the layout better,” I said to the top of David’s smoothly shaven head, which was hovering over a small map of San Diego State University’s campus. “Then again, I was only …
Will you map the distance from Mia and Kerry’s place to the theater?” I called to David from the bathroom, where I was busy patting my head with wet hands to de-frizz my hair. “Why?,” …
If I were asked to describe myself using ten adjectives, “tact” would not be among them. So it was that, upon being introduced to a young man at the opening reception for David’s latest photographic …
Every so often I find myself confronted by a seemingly innocuous phrase that rubs me the wrong way. This week, the offending line is “Don’t let it get to you,” a sentiment that simultaneously comforts …
I pulled my bare feet onto the bed and smiled awkwardly at the stranger in the room. David and I watched as the man excavated a shard of glass from behind a sofa cushion. He …
I thought it would take more than the promise of seeing a few dogs to incentivize making a trip to El Cajon in the middle of a heat wave. The temperature climbs one degree for …
I grimaced at the tiny slip of paper in my hand. “I think this one’s written in German,” I groaned. “How am I supposed to give clues or act it out if I don’t even …
When my eyes flutter open each morning I am never aware of what the theme for the day will be. I’m not talking about one story, like the same headline posted by 20 different Facebook …
"Isn’t it nice here?” “It’s beautiful,” I said to my friend Jen. I made a sweeping glance of the restaurant’s patio, taking in the coral bougainvillea blossoms, the green leaves cascading from the trellis, and …
When I pulled up at Mike’s studio and his car was nowhere in sight, my gut clenched with comprehension. I knew even as I was texting “Where are you?” that Mike was a no-show. My …
My fist shot straight out from my side, crossing in front of David’s chest, and released an index finger, aimed at the driver of the car to my right. It held the pose for half …
I spend a lot of time online. Okay, more than a lot. The point is, I get around the interwebz. Though I’ve long considered “web surfing” my primary hobby, it wasn’t until I discovered Reddit …