Here's something you might be interested in.
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed
Big Screen — Movie commentary
Blurt — Music's inside track
Booze News — San Diego spirits
Classical Music — Immortal beauty
Classifieds — Free and easy
Close to Home — What it’s like on the street where you live
Cover Stories — Front-page features
Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes
Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts
Feast! — Food & drink reviews
Feature Stories — Local news & stories
Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore
From the Archives — Spotlight on the past
Golden Dreams — Talk of the town
The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it
Letters — Our inbox
Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites
Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans
Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists
Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news
News Ticker — News & politics
Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated
Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna
Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated
Poetry — The old and the new
Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers
Reading — The hunt for intellectuals
Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails
San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds
SD on the QT — Almost factual news
Sheep and Goats — Places of worship
Special Issues — The best of
Street Style — San Diego streets have style
Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves
Theater — On stage in San Diego this week
Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative
Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work
Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego
Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads
Your Week — Daily event picks
Nextdoor wars: A coffin in Clairemont
Death in the suburbs
Neighborhood marker or headstone? You be the judge.
San Diego has always been a city of hidden stories — murmured in the spaces between sun-bleached bungalows, whispered over backyard fences, and now, increasingly, shouted into the digital void of neighborhood apps. And nowhere are these narratives more brutally and hilariously exposed than on Nextdoor, the social media platform that has become the city's most unfiltered confessional.
Birthed in 1955 by developer C. Arnholt Smith, Clairemont emerged as San Diego's first master-planned community: a dusty mesa transformed into a quintessential post-World War II suburb. Originally a uniform landscape of identical ranch-style homes designed for returning veterans, the neighborhood has naturally become more varied with time, and has acquired a bit of a reputation. Famously, Clairemont High School served as the inspiration for the film Fast Times at Ridgemont High. And Mark Hamill, aka Luke Skywalker, spent his formative years in Clairemont. He even has a street named after him there.
The original post
Detractors might say that Clairemont can be kind of dead. Maybe that's why someone dumped a coffin in an alley. Yes, you read that correctly — a proper metal coffin, painted pearlescent white and featuring chrome blocks on the corners. The homeowner posting about it was none too pleased, and called out the lowlife who thought this might be a good way to dispose of a coffin. Said lowlife's vehicle was described as an “older 4-cylinder pickup”. Because nothing says “I’m looking for an alley in which to dispose of a coffin” like a pickup truck that’s been through its fair share of “I’m just gonna send it” moments.
At this point, Nextdoor's crowdsourcing power kicked in: another resident had spotted both truck and coffin in line at a Del Taco drive through. (Insert joke about Del Taco's food and/or customers here.)
Comments/Observations
1. “Isn’t this subject dead yet??”
Oh ho ho! You know what they say: dying is easy, comedy is hard.
2. “At least it was empty… we hope.”
A good mix of optimism and dread here. Perhaps the poster recalled the recent situation in Allied Gardens.
3. “Guys, this isn’t funny. It’s a very grave situation.”
Dad joke for the win!
“If this is for real, it would probably be wise to involve the police. This could be a sign of foul play. Getting ahead of myself; maybe it’s insurance fraud… fake death or some other scam. Call the police.”
Fake deaths, insurance fraud, foul play? What is this, Law & Order: SVU: Clairemont?
4. “Ooh ooh does that mean there’s a zombie on the loose?”
Finally, a theory I can get behind!
5. “Climb in and tell us if it’s comfortable.”
If someone leaves a coffin in an alley, it's up for grabs. That's just the rule. Everybody knows it. And pretty much everyone is going to need a coffin at some point, unless they go the cremation route. But it does raise the question: unless you're a vampire, who cares if a coffin is comfortable?
6. “Does this count as a granny flat?”
Or at least maybe a bedroom addition? Home prices are murder these days!
7. “If it was bought at Costco you can return it, no questions asked.”
Costco, where you can get a coffin, a 72-pack of toilet paper, and a 60-pound bag of dog food all in one trip.
Video:
The Simpsons: Monstromart
8. “Call a funeral home to pick it up. Maybe even donate it to LA for the victims lost in the fires.”
Do-gooder killing the fun time vibe. As if San Diego doesn't have plenty of dead people in need of storage.
9. “Right when I start to think Nextdoor is a Karen/Ken app where people with way too much time on their hands turn it into a perennial FESTIVUS… this post pops up and the responses are awesome… Thank you, humanity.”
Aw.
Final Thought
While other neighborhoods might be busy with property values and yoga studios, Clairemont turned a simple question about a coffin into an entertaining communal event. We salute you.
Here's something you might be interested in.
Nextdoor wars: A coffin in Clairemont
Death in the suburbs
Nextdoor wars: A coffin in Clairemont
Death in the suburbs
Neighborhood marker or headstone? You be the judge.
San Diego has always been a city of hidden stories — murmured in the spaces between sun-bleached bungalows, whispered over backyard fences, and now, increasingly, shouted into the digital void of neighborhood apps. And nowhere are these narratives more brutally and hilariously exposed than on Nextdoor, the social media platform that has become the city's most unfiltered confessional.
Birthed in 1955 by developer C. Arnholt Smith, Clairemont emerged as San Diego's first master-planned community: a dusty mesa transformed into a quintessential post-World War II suburb. Originally a uniform landscape of identical ranch-style homes designed for returning veterans, the neighborhood has naturally become more varied with time, and has acquired a bit of a reputation. Famously, Clairemont High School served as the inspiration for the film Fast Times at Ridgemont High. And Mark Hamill, aka Luke Skywalker, spent his formative years in Clairemont. He even has a street named after him there.
The original post
Detractors might say that Clairemont can be kind of dead. Maybe that's why someone dumped a coffin in an alley. Yes, you read that correctly — a proper metal coffin, painted pearlescent white and featuring chrome blocks on the corners. The homeowner posting about it was none too pleased, and called out the lowlife who thought this might be a good way to dispose of a coffin. Said lowlife's vehicle was described as an “older 4-cylinder pickup”. Because nothing says “I’m looking for an alley in which to dispose of a coffin” like a pickup truck that’s been through its fair share of “I’m just gonna send it” moments.
At this point, Nextdoor's crowdsourcing power kicked in: another resident had spotted both truck and coffin in line at a Del Taco drive through. (Insert joke about Del Taco's food and/or customers here.)
Comments/Observations
1. “Isn’t this subject dead yet??”
Oh ho ho! You know what they say: dying is easy, comedy is hard.
2. “At least it was empty… we hope.”
A good mix of optimism and dread here. Perhaps the poster recalled the recent situation in Allied Gardens.
3. “Guys, this isn’t funny. It’s a very grave situation.”
Dad joke for the win!
“If this is for real, it would probably be wise to involve the police. This could be a sign of foul play. Getting ahead of myself; maybe it’s insurance fraud… fake death or some other scam. Call the police.”
Fake deaths, insurance fraud, foul play? What is this, Law & Order: SVU: Clairemont?
4. “Ooh ooh does that mean there’s a zombie on the loose?”
Finally, a theory I can get behind!
5. “Climb in and tell us if it’s comfortable.”
If someone leaves a coffin in an alley, it's up for grabs. That's just the rule. Everybody knows it. And pretty much everyone is going to need a coffin at some point, unless they go the cremation route. But it does raise the question: unless you're a vampire, who cares if a coffin is comfortable?
6. “Does this count as a granny flat?”
Or at least maybe a bedroom addition? Home prices are murder these days!
7. “If it was bought at Costco you can return it, no questions asked.”
Costco, where you can get a coffin, a 72-pack of toilet paper, and a 60-pound bag of dog food all in one trip.
Video:
The Simpsons: Monstromart
8. “Call a funeral home to pick it up. Maybe even donate it to LA for the victims lost in the fires.”
Do-gooder killing the fun time vibe. As if San Diego doesn't have plenty of dead people in need of storage.
9. “Right when I start to think Nextdoor is a Karen/Ken app where people with way too much time on their hands turn it into a perennial FESTIVUS… this post pops up and the responses are awesome… Thank you, humanity.”
Aw.
Final Thought
While other neighborhoods might be busy with property values and yoga studios, Clairemont turned a simple question about a coffin into an entertaining communal event. We salute you.
Comments