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Amazon’s Bezos gives Institute $30 million to find “cure” for ailing climate

Salk It To ‘Em

Dread Zeppelin? Artist’s rendering of Bezos Blimp taking off from La Jolla to disperse Final Climate Solution through the atmosphere. “Here at Amazon, it’s always Day One,” says Bezos. “Or, as some people have put it, The Beginning.”
Dread Zeppelin? Artist’s rendering of Bezos Blimp taking off from La Jolla to disperse Final Climate Solution through the atmosphere. “Here at Amazon, it’s always Day One,” says Bezos. “Or, as some people have put it, The Beginning.”

Last week, Amazon overlord Jeff Bezos announced the first winners in his $10 billion climate change giveaway; among them was La Jolla’s own Salk Institute, the recipient of $30 million in recognition of its potential to speed the planet’s healing. “Jonas Salk famously aided in the development of a vaccine for the scourge of polio,” said Bezos in his remarks during the announcement. “Today, the planet faces a similar scourge, a disease that is raising its temperature drastically while simultaneously dehydrating it and depleting its internal resources, compromising its ability to heal. We know this scourge by many names: Wal-Mart shoppers, anti-tech political activists, or simply people who feel they are too poor to take advantage of Amazon Prime’s incredible savings. We know it’s a life-threatening condition, and will not be easy to eradicate. But the same could be said for polio, and look what Jonas Salk was able to accomplish there. The earth needs a vaccine; I’m proud to help the Salk Institute make that happen. And if any Prime customers should find themselves accidentally inoculated, a Prime delivery drone can rush deliver Amazon’s proprietary antidote within just two hours!”

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Dread Zeppelin? Artist’s rendering of Bezos Blimp taking off from La Jolla to disperse Final Climate Solution through the atmosphere. “Here at Amazon, it’s always Day One,” says Bezos. “Or, as some people have put it, The Beginning.”
Dread Zeppelin? Artist’s rendering of Bezos Blimp taking off from La Jolla to disperse Final Climate Solution through the atmosphere. “Here at Amazon, it’s always Day One,” says Bezos. “Or, as some people have put it, The Beginning.”

Last week, Amazon overlord Jeff Bezos announced the first winners in his $10 billion climate change giveaway; among them was La Jolla’s own Salk Institute, the recipient of $30 million in recognition of its potential to speed the planet’s healing. “Jonas Salk famously aided in the development of a vaccine for the scourge of polio,” said Bezos in his remarks during the announcement. “Today, the planet faces a similar scourge, a disease that is raising its temperature drastically while simultaneously dehydrating it and depleting its internal resources, compromising its ability to heal. We know this scourge by many names: Wal-Mart shoppers, anti-tech political activists, or simply people who feel they are too poor to take advantage of Amazon Prime’s incredible savings. We know it’s a life-threatening condition, and will not be easy to eradicate. But the same could be said for polio, and look what Jonas Salk was able to accomplish there. The earth needs a vaccine; I’m proud to help the Salk Institute make that happen. And if any Prime customers should find themselves accidentally inoculated, a Prime delivery drone can rush deliver Amazon’s proprietary antidote within just two hours!”

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