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California brings in Barney the Dinosaur to “ease people’s fears about purple tiers”
Purple Pal
Shut it down/ Stay at home/ It’s okay to die alone/ Non-essential businesses are closed/ We’re not as safe as we supposed.
The news that San Diego County had reported enough new cases of covid-19 to be relegated from the red “substantial” tier to the purple “widespread” tier was welcomed by all right-thinking San Diegans, eager to do whatever they could to slow the spread of the disease that seems to be resisting efforts to slow its spread in countries around the world. But unfortunately, some people, such as small business owners who will now be required to shut down once again, have behaved like spoiled children, whining “What about me?” and “I’m hungry; I want to eat!” Happily, rather than punish them for their selfish tantrums, our benevolent Governor Newsom has instead decided to show them mercy and understanding by summoning the purple tier’s mascot, Barney, to soothe their upset and help them transition into this new stage of life.
“Shuttering your business just as it was getting back on its feet can be a scary time, full of uncertainty,” says Newsom. “Owners have lots of questions. Why is this happening? What happens to my family? Will anyone come to save me? Does the science really support these measures? Of course, answers to questions like that are impossible. What owners need instead is someone to reassure them that they are loved, and that if it weren’t forbidden by social distancing guidelines, Barney would be happy to give them a big hug and sing them a song. In the end, that’s more than most of us can hope for, and definitely more than we deserve. In the meantime, he can be seen on television every weekday morning at 10, giving these troubled souls something to look forward to during the hours they would normally be at work.”
Here's something you might be interested in.
California brings in Barney the Dinosaur to “ease people’s fears about purple tiers”
Purple Pal
California brings in Barney the Dinosaur to “ease people’s fears about purple tiers”
Purple Pal
Shut it down/ Stay at home/ It’s okay to die alone/ Non-essential businesses are closed/ We’re not as safe as we supposed.
The news that San Diego County had reported enough new cases of covid-19 to be relegated from the red “substantial” tier to the purple “widespread” tier was welcomed by all right-thinking San Diegans, eager to do whatever they could to slow the spread of the disease that seems to be resisting efforts to slow its spread in countries around the world. But unfortunately, some people, such as small business owners who will now be required to shut down once again, have behaved like spoiled children, whining “What about me?” and “I’m hungry; I want to eat!” Happily, rather than punish them for their selfish tantrums, our benevolent Governor Newsom has instead decided to show them mercy and understanding by summoning the purple tier’s mascot, Barney, to soothe their upset and help them transition into this new stage of life.
“Shuttering your business just as it was getting back on its feet can be a scary time, full of uncertainty,” says Newsom. “Owners have lots of questions. Why is this happening? What happens to my family? Will anyone come to save me? Does the science really support these measures? Of course, answers to questions like that are impossible. What owners need instead is someone to reassure them that they are loved, and that if it weren’t forbidden by social distancing guidelines, Barney would be happy to give them a big hug and sing them a song. In the end, that’s more than most of us can hope for, and definitely more than we deserve. In the meantime, he can be seen on television every weekday morning at 10, giving these troubled souls something to look forward to during the hours they would normally be at work.”
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