Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Newly confirmed Catholic Supreme Court Justice authors opinion affirming right of San Diego strip clubs to remain open despite pandemic

They Bend Over, We Bow Down

Justice Barrett, after the ruling: “Do I want my daughters to strip, or my sons to visit strip clubs? No, of course not. But as I said during my confirmation hearings, my goal as a justice is to defend the law in light of the Constitution, regardless of my personal feelings on the matter. My fellow Catholics have a right to receive Jesus’ body in communion during a pandemic, and it’s not the government’s job to say that those who reverence another sort of body are any less deserving. Look at this photo from Pacers last Saturday night and tell me how it’s different from church — the lights, the special clothing, the rapt devotion of the faithful before they make their offerings. Of course, they’re all going to hell, but that’s not the government’s business, either.”
Justice Barrett, after the ruling: “Do I want my daughters to strip, or my sons to visit strip clubs? No, of course not. But as I said during my confirmation hearings, my goal as a justice is to defend the law in light of the Constitution, regardless of my personal feelings on the matter. My fellow Catholics have a right to receive Jesus’ body in communion during a pandemic, and it’s not the government’s job to say that those who reverence another sort of body are any less deserving. Look at this photo from Pacers last Saturday night and tell me how it’s different from church — the lights, the special clothing, the rapt devotion of the faithful before they make their offerings. Of course, they’re all going to hell, but that’s not the government’s business, either.”

There will be no midnight Masses this Christmas Eve in California, thanks to the curfew imposed by the governor’s stay-at-home order, imposed in an effort to stop the rapid proliferation of covid-19. And there will be no Christmas Eve ‘unwrappings’ in the private Champagne Room of Pacers strip club either, for the same reason. But the churches will still have services to mark Jesus’ birthday, and the girls will still shimmy down the chimney pole in their Santa’s Helper skivvies — again, for the same reason. Because both activities have just been designated as protected from government regulation by no less an authority than the United States Supreme Court, thanks to a 5-4 decision in which new Justice Amy Comey Barrett wrote the majority opinion.

Facade of temple in Khajuraho, India. From the ruling Pacers vs. Becerra: “The great ancient historian Herodotus, among others, described the Babylonian practice of sacred prostitution. And who among the sexually experienced can deny that there is something transporting, even transcendent about the sexual act? Not for nothing do the French call orgasm ‘La petite mort’ - the little death. The very word ‘ecstasy’ takes its root from the Latin ‘ex-stasis’ - standing outside. In the moment of climax, we take leave of ourselves, in much the same way as a Catholic mystic or tribal shaman. It is true that the modern strip club does not include such ecstasies - not legally, anyway - but then again, modern Jewish temples no longer offer literal blood sacrifices to atone for sin. In both cases, the spirit of the practice remains. Pacers is, for a certain sort of soul, a kind of church, and is therefore protected in the same manner as the churches in our previous ruling on the matter of pandemic-based shutdowns.”

“Over the years, we’ve been served very well by the claim that stripping is speech, and therefore deserving of special protection,” says jubilant Pacers owner Joey Scuzzball. “And that was the line taken by San Diego Superior Court Judge Joel Wohlfeil. But it wasn’t enough to keep AG Xavier Becerra — who’s probably feeling pretty high and mighty ever since Biden decided to reward him with a cabinet post for his spirited prosecution of that Planned Parenthood sting video guy — from saying he was still gonna come after us for violating California’s stay-at-home order. Funnily enough, that’s what gave me the idea for switching from a free speech argument to a freedom of religion argument. The same lawyers defending the guy who went after Planned Parenthood are representing some California churches in their effort to stay open. And as we saw last month in Roman Catholic Diocese of Brooklyn vs. Cuomo, this new lady Justice is friendly to their way of thinking. Free speech is tricky - you can’t shout fire in a crowded theater, so maybe you can’t shake your moneymaker in a crowded titty bar. But religious freedom is having a moment. I knew it was just a matter of getting our case in front of Honorable Mrs. Jesus there in Washington, and I was right!”

Sponsored
Sponsored

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Escondido planners nix office building switch to apartments

Not enough open space, not enough closets for Hickory Street plans
Justice Barrett, after the ruling: “Do I want my daughters to strip, or my sons to visit strip clubs? No, of course not. But as I said during my confirmation hearings, my goal as a justice is to defend the law in light of the Constitution, regardless of my personal feelings on the matter. My fellow Catholics have a right to receive Jesus’ body in communion during a pandemic, and it’s not the government’s job to say that those who reverence another sort of body are any less deserving. Look at this photo from Pacers last Saturday night and tell me how it’s different from church — the lights, the special clothing, the rapt devotion of the faithful before they make their offerings. Of course, they’re all going to hell, but that’s not the government’s business, either.”
Justice Barrett, after the ruling: “Do I want my daughters to strip, or my sons to visit strip clubs? No, of course not. But as I said during my confirmation hearings, my goal as a justice is to defend the law in light of the Constitution, regardless of my personal feelings on the matter. My fellow Catholics have a right to receive Jesus’ body in communion during a pandemic, and it’s not the government’s job to say that those who reverence another sort of body are any less deserving. Look at this photo from Pacers last Saturday night and tell me how it’s different from church — the lights, the special clothing, the rapt devotion of the faithful before they make their offerings. Of course, they’re all going to hell, but that’s not the government’s business, either.”

There will be no midnight Masses this Christmas Eve in California, thanks to the curfew imposed by the governor’s stay-at-home order, imposed in an effort to stop the rapid proliferation of covid-19. And there will be no Christmas Eve ‘unwrappings’ in the private Champagne Room of Pacers strip club either, for the same reason. But the churches will still have services to mark Jesus’ birthday, and the girls will still shimmy down the chimney pole in their Santa’s Helper skivvies — again, for the same reason. Because both activities have just been designated as protected from government regulation by no less an authority than the United States Supreme Court, thanks to a 5-4 decision in which new Justice Amy Comey Barrett wrote the majority opinion.

Facade of temple in Khajuraho, India. From the ruling Pacers vs. Becerra: “The great ancient historian Herodotus, among others, described the Babylonian practice of sacred prostitution. And who among the sexually experienced can deny that there is something transporting, even transcendent about the sexual act? Not for nothing do the French call orgasm ‘La petite mort’ - the little death. The very word ‘ecstasy’ takes its root from the Latin ‘ex-stasis’ - standing outside. In the moment of climax, we take leave of ourselves, in much the same way as a Catholic mystic or tribal shaman. It is true that the modern strip club does not include such ecstasies - not legally, anyway - but then again, modern Jewish temples no longer offer literal blood sacrifices to atone for sin. In both cases, the spirit of the practice remains. Pacers is, for a certain sort of soul, a kind of church, and is therefore protected in the same manner as the churches in our previous ruling on the matter of pandemic-based shutdowns.”

“Over the years, we’ve been served very well by the claim that stripping is speech, and therefore deserving of special protection,” says jubilant Pacers owner Joey Scuzzball. “And that was the line taken by San Diego Superior Court Judge Joel Wohlfeil. But it wasn’t enough to keep AG Xavier Becerra — who’s probably feeling pretty high and mighty ever since Biden decided to reward him with a cabinet post for his spirited prosecution of that Planned Parenthood sting video guy — from saying he was still gonna come after us for violating California’s stay-at-home order. Funnily enough, that’s what gave me the idea for switching from a free speech argument to a freedom of religion argument. The same lawyers defending the guy who went after Planned Parenthood are representing some California churches in their effort to stay open. And as we saw last month in Roman Catholic Diocese of Brooklyn vs. Cuomo, this new lady Justice is friendly to their way of thinking. Free speech is tricky - you can’t shout fire in a crowded theater, so maybe you can’t shake your moneymaker in a crowded titty bar. But religious freedom is having a moment. I knew it was just a matter of getting our case in front of Honorable Mrs. Jesus there in Washington, and I was right!”

Sponsored
Sponsored
Comments
Sponsored

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Syrian treat maker Hakmi Sweets makes Dubai chocolate bars

Look for the counter shop inside a Mediterranean grill in El Cajon
Next Article

San Diego Dim Sum Tour, Warwick’s Holiday Open House

Events November 24-November 27, 2024
Comments
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader