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Imagining defeat with Silver Jews singer David Berman

Also known as the author of Actual Air and The Portable February poetry books

  • Imagining Defeat
  • She woke me up at dawn,
  • her suitcase like a little brown dog at her heels.
  • I sat up and looked out the window
  • at the snow falling in the stand of blackjack trees.
  • A bus ticket in her hand.
  • Then she brought something black up to her mouth,
  • a plum I thought, but it was an asthma inhaler.
  • I reached under the bed for my menthols
  • and she asked if I ever thought of cancer.
  • Yes, I said, but always as a tree way up ahead
  • in the distance where it doesn’t matter
  • And I suppose a dead soul must look back at that tree,
  • so far behind his wagon where it also doesn’t matter.
  • except as a memory of rest or water.
  • Though to believe any of that, I thought,
  • you have to accept the premise
  • that she woke me up at all. 
  • Catullus CX
  • Alfie, honest mistresses are lauded;
  • The presents they receive they earn, but you,
  • Who lead me on with lies, leave me defrauded.
  • My anti-mistress, brazen what you do;
  • You keep my gifts but, suddenly demure,
  • Renege on my reward. Either be chaste
  • Before accepting fees or be the whore
  • That you pretend, your total body placed
  • Where just your mouth is. Greed and “virtue” make
  • Strange bedfellows, each sure the other’s fake.
  • And the Others
  • Some find The Light in literature;
  • Others in fine art,
  • And some persist in being sure
  • The Light shines in the heart.
  • Some find The Light in alcohol;
  • Some, in the sexual spark;
  • Some never find The Light at all
  • And make do with the dark,
  • And one might guess that these would be
  • A gloomy lot indeed,
  • But, no, The Light they never see
  • They think they do not need. 
David Berman, author of "Imagining Defeat"

David Berman (1967-2019) was an American poet, also known as a rock musician and singer with the band Silver Jews. Born in Williamsburg, VA, Berman attended University of Virginia, where he met his future Silver Jews band mates. Berman recorded six albums with the Silver Jews as well as a solo album, and wrote two books of poems – Actual Air (1999) and The Portable February (2009). This past August, Berman took his own life.

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  • Imagining Defeat
  • She woke me up at dawn,
  • her suitcase like a little brown dog at her heels.
  • I sat up and looked out the window
  • at the snow falling in the stand of blackjack trees.
  • A bus ticket in her hand.
  • Then she brought something black up to her mouth,
  • a plum I thought, but it was an asthma inhaler.
  • I reached under the bed for my menthols
  • and she asked if I ever thought of cancer.
  • Yes, I said, but always as a tree way up ahead
  • in the distance where it doesn’t matter
  • And I suppose a dead soul must look back at that tree,
  • so far behind his wagon where it also doesn’t matter.
  • except as a memory of rest or water.
  • Though to believe any of that, I thought,
  • you have to accept the premise
  • that she woke me up at all. 
  • Catullus CX
  • Alfie, honest mistresses are lauded;
  • The presents they receive they earn, but you,
  • Who lead me on with lies, leave me defrauded.
  • My anti-mistress, brazen what you do;
  • You keep my gifts but, suddenly demure,
  • Renege on my reward. Either be chaste
  • Before accepting fees or be the whore
  • That you pretend, your total body placed
  • Where just your mouth is. Greed and “virtue” make
  • Strange bedfellows, each sure the other’s fake.
  • And the Others
  • Some find The Light in literature;
  • Others in fine art,
  • And some persist in being sure
  • The Light shines in the heart.
  • Some find The Light in alcohol;
  • Some, in the sexual spark;
  • Some never find The Light at all
  • And make do with the dark,
  • And one might guess that these would be
  • A gloomy lot indeed,
  • But, no, The Light they never see
  • They think they do not need. 
David Berman, author of "Imagining Defeat"

David Berman (1967-2019) was an American poet, also known as a rock musician and singer with the band Silver Jews. Born in Williamsburg, VA, Berman attended University of Virginia, where he met his future Silver Jews band mates. Berman recorded six albums with the Silver Jews as well as a solo album, and wrote two books of poems – Actual Air (1999) and The Portable February (2009). This past August, Berman took his own life.

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