Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Enthusiastically endorsing Drumstick ice cream breakfast cereal

Should be more appealing to adults with a healthy sense of ironic humor than it should to little kiddos

Unicorn, blazed on nostalgia.
Unicorn, blazed on nostalgia.

Dear Hipster:

I get how things normally work. Hipsters are into hipster stuff before it’s cool, then, after the hipster stuff attains mainstream popularity, hipsters are “over it” because it’s too mainstream. That’s old news since 2011, when the first ever person told the joke about the hipster burning his mouth by eating pizza before it was cool (still funny though). Anyways, here’s more of a modern corollary to that particular principle. Is it ever possible for something to be totally mainstream, but also cool and hipster at the same time?! After you get over having your mind blown by that idea, please give it some thought.

— Addie

Sponsored
Sponsored

Hold on a second.

[Picks up pieces of blown mind.]

Whoa. Heavy. But, yeah, totes possible. You know how venture capitalists and their ilk are always talking about “unicorns,” i.e. privately held companies worth in excess of $1 billion? Well, this is kind of like that, except it’s important instead of an idle pastime for the ludicrously wealthy. At least, I think it’s important, which is all that matters here.

Anyways, in rare instances, you get stuff that originated in the mainstream, but is nevertheless actually kind of cool and hipster for various reasons. Consider, e.g., General Mills’ recent release of a breakfast cereal flavored like Drumstick ice cream novelties. This is only the most recent salvo in a war between cereal manufacturers hoping to WHAM the cereal-consuming public with ever wackier, more ironic morning pseudofoods. This corporate assault on the American pancreas certainly contains a sinister edge, as the companies tend to debut these fanciful sugar sensations at Walmarts in middle America, which places unwholesome breakfast fare within reach of the Walmart-shopping public that needs it least.

At the same time, you can’t deny the coolness, from an adult perspective, of a breakfast food that emulates a beloved treat from childhood. If anything, Drumstick cereal should be more appealing to adults with a healthy sense of ironic humor than it should to little kiddos, who haven’t yet had the time to develop any memories worth being nostalgic over.

Thus, I feel comfortable enthusiastically endorsing the hipness of Drumstick (and other, similarly bizarre) breakfast cereals, notwithstanding their thoroughly mainstream origins. If I had to develop a kind of litmus test, it would be something like the following: could I, after consuming between three and seven Tecates at a local house party, corner an unsuspecting party guest, and praise the brazen, self-aware ridiculousness of something while simultaneously condemning its shameless consumerism? If the answer is “yes,” I might be looking at a hipster unicorn.

The test works for things other than breakfast cereals. For example, imagine it’s Memorial Day weekend, you don’t know me at all, and we’re both waiting in line for the single, pathetically overburdened bathroom in a North Park bungalow while a bunch of people we both vaguely know are washing down grass-fed burgers and organic hotdogs with too much Mexican beer. Apropos of nothing, I offer, “Yeah, sure, it’s a shallow bid to squeeze a few more millions out of an ailing franchise, but the producers sure showed some stones having the guy from Deadpool voice an electric hamster. It’s totally ridiculous, but, for whatever reason, I’m ok with Detective Pikachu.” Can’t argue with that kind of unimpeachable logic.

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Tigers In Cairo owes its existence to Craigslist

But it owes its name to a Cure tune and a tattoo
Next Article

Trophy truck crushes four at Baja 1000

"Two other racers on quads died too,"
Unicorn, blazed on nostalgia.
Unicorn, blazed on nostalgia.

Dear Hipster:

I get how things normally work. Hipsters are into hipster stuff before it’s cool, then, after the hipster stuff attains mainstream popularity, hipsters are “over it” because it’s too mainstream. That’s old news since 2011, when the first ever person told the joke about the hipster burning his mouth by eating pizza before it was cool (still funny though). Anyways, here’s more of a modern corollary to that particular principle. Is it ever possible for something to be totally mainstream, but also cool and hipster at the same time?! After you get over having your mind blown by that idea, please give it some thought.

— Addie

Sponsored
Sponsored

Hold on a second.

[Picks up pieces of blown mind.]

Whoa. Heavy. But, yeah, totes possible. You know how venture capitalists and their ilk are always talking about “unicorns,” i.e. privately held companies worth in excess of $1 billion? Well, this is kind of like that, except it’s important instead of an idle pastime for the ludicrously wealthy. At least, I think it’s important, which is all that matters here.

Anyways, in rare instances, you get stuff that originated in the mainstream, but is nevertheless actually kind of cool and hipster for various reasons. Consider, e.g., General Mills’ recent release of a breakfast cereal flavored like Drumstick ice cream novelties. This is only the most recent salvo in a war between cereal manufacturers hoping to WHAM the cereal-consuming public with ever wackier, more ironic morning pseudofoods. This corporate assault on the American pancreas certainly contains a sinister edge, as the companies tend to debut these fanciful sugar sensations at Walmarts in middle America, which places unwholesome breakfast fare within reach of the Walmart-shopping public that needs it least.

At the same time, you can’t deny the coolness, from an adult perspective, of a breakfast food that emulates a beloved treat from childhood. If anything, Drumstick cereal should be more appealing to adults with a healthy sense of ironic humor than it should to little kiddos, who haven’t yet had the time to develop any memories worth being nostalgic over.

Thus, I feel comfortable enthusiastically endorsing the hipness of Drumstick (and other, similarly bizarre) breakfast cereals, notwithstanding their thoroughly mainstream origins. If I had to develop a kind of litmus test, it would be something like the following: could I, after consuming between three and seven Tecates at a local house party, corner an unsuspecting party guest, and praise the brazen, self-aware ridiculousness of something while simultaneously condemning its shameless consumerism? If the answer is “yes,” I might be looking at a hipster unicorn.

The test works for things other than breakfast cereals. For example, imagine it’s Memorial Day weekend, you don’t know me at all, and we’re both waiting in line for the single, pathetically overburdened bathroom in a North Park bungalow while a bunch of people we both vaguely know are washing down grass-fed burgers and organic hotdogs with too much Mexican beer. Apropos of nothing, I offer, “Yeah, sure, it’s a shallow bid to squeeze a few more millions out of an ailing franchise, but the producers sure showed some stones having the guy from Deadpool voice an electric hamster. It’s totally ridiculous, but, for whatever reason, I’m ok with Detective Pikachu.” Can’t argue with that kind of unimpeachable logic.

Comments
Sponsored

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Syrian treat maker Hakmi Sweets makes Dubai chocolate bars

Look for the counter shop inside a Mediterranean grill in El Cajon
Next Article

Southern California Asks: 'What Is Vinivia?' Meet the New Creator-First Livestreaming App

Comments
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader