Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Always another reason to scorn

Zaym Malink
Zaym Malink

Dear Hipster:

What is the significance to popular music, and pop culture in general, if One Direction breaks up following the departure of Zayn Malik from the band? If Justin Bieber has truly slid into the twilight of his somewhat limited career, who will the hipsters have left to hate if One Direction breaks up?

Sponsored
Sponsored

— At Least Half Serious Bill, Golden Hill

Justin who? Zayn Malik what? But, for real, that I might illustrate just how non-existent are the ramifications of a potential One Direction split, permit me this non-exhaustive list of real problems I worry about more than Zayn Malik’s quitting 2015’s ex-hottest boy band: Why I can’t seem to find Boo Berry cereal anymore; whether the Brooklyn Bridge will remain standing in perpetuity, considering the Manhattan end of the bridge rests on sand, not bedrock; how often to wash my favorite 501 shrink-to-fit jeans (obviously not very often, but how infrequently?); whether Taylor Swift’s grammar is good or bad based on her use of “their” as a singular pronoun; potential collapses in the price of California spiny lobster caused by fluctuations in Chinese demand; SARS; bird flu; swine flu; ebola; whatever health pandemic next strikes fear into our collective hearts; how much Kim loves Kanye; how much Kanye loves Kanye; and, last, but certainly not least, whether anybody even bothered to read this far into my rant instead of just skipping to the devilishly sassy paragraph break right about here.

You jest, Bill, and I repay that in kind, but I discern a nugget of truthiness in your question. Hipsters are known to be haters of all things mainstream, and the horrifyingly average boy band ditties dropped by One Direction make for an exceptional touchstone for perfect mainstreamness. But the nature of pop culture is such that we will always find reason to scorn mainstream artists.

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

In-n-Out alters iconic symbol to reflect “modern-day California”

Keep Palm and Carry On?
Zaym Malink
Zaym Malink

Dear Hipster:

What is the significance to popular music, and pop culture in general, if One Direction breaks up following the departure of Zayn Malik from the band? If Justin Bieber has truly slid into the twilight of his somewhat limited career, who will the hipsters have left to hate if One Direction breaks up?

Sponsored
Sponsored

— At Least Half Serious Bill, Golden Hill

Justin who? Zayn Malik what? But, for real, that I might illustrate just how non-existent are the ramifications of a potential One Direction split, permit me this non-exhaustive list of real problems I worry about more than Zayn Malik’s quitting 2015’s ex-hottest boy band: Why I can’t seem to find Boo Berry cereal anymore; whether the Brooklyn Bridge will remain standing in perpetuity, considering the Manhattan end of the bridge rests on sand, not bedrock; how often to wash my favorite 501 shrink-to-fit jeans (obviously not very often, but how infrequently?); whether Taylor Swift’s grammar is good or bad based on her use of “their” as a singular pronoun; potential collapses in the price of California spiny lobster caused by fluctuations in Chinese demand; SARS; bird flu; swine flu; ebola; whatever health pandemic next strikes fear into our collective hearts; how much Kim loves Kanye; how much Kanye loves Kanye; and, last, but certainly not least, whether anybody even bothered to read this far into my rant instead of just skipping to the devilishly sassy paragraph break right about here.

You jest, Bill, and I repay that in kind, but I discern a nugget of truthiness in your question. Hipsters are known to be haters of all things mainstream, and the horrifyingly average boy band ditties dropped by One Direction make for an exceptional touchstone for perfect mainstreamness. But the nature of pop culture is such that we will always find reason to scorn mainstream artists.

Comments
Sponsored

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Gonzo Report: Eating dinner while little kids mock-mosh at Golden Island

“The tot absorbs the punk rock shot with the skill of experience”
Next Article

NORTH COUNTY’S BEST PERSONAL TRAINER: NICOLE HANSULT HELPING YOU FEEL STRONG, CONFIDENT, AND VIBRANT AT ANY AGE

Comments
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader