Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Vitriolic toward hipsterkind

Hating hipsters is soooo mainstream.

Dear Hipster:

Why are all you such pretentious douches? Is it wrong of me to want to hit all of you in the face? What is especially troubling is how you guys are now starting to show up at the “hippie” concerts that I love. Why don’t you just keep listening to Mumford and Sons, you have already stolen them from us, and, frankly, we don’t want them back.

Sponsored
Sponsored

— Jack

What flavor Haterade are you drinking there? I at least hope the chilling callousness with which you disregard an entire subculture keeps it icy cold! Nobody likes warm bitterness.

Besides, hating hipsters is so mainstream.

You see what I did there? By pointing out how unoriginal your anti-hipster platform is, I deflect your rage. Your anger glances off my Wayfarers as I crash your hippie concert. Did you catch O.A.R. at the BellyUp? I was at a Terrible Ivan house show in South Park that night.

But, seriously, who doesn’t hate hipsters these days? There’s a glut of blogs, a tumult of Tumblrs, a concussive mass of YouTube videos all vitriolic toward hipsterkind. People go so far as to wish death, or at least collective face punching, upon total strangers. And for what? The common complaint goes like, “those fucking hipsters stole my x,” where x can be hippie concerts, fashion, or beverage. An old, but still Google-popular, post from a blogger (the ironically named and not-very-wise, “Unconventional Wisdom”) accused hipsters of stealing her favorite beer, Pabst Blue Ribbon. So what if she hadn’t even been born yet when Pabst sales experienced their historical peak in 1977? I would illustrate here that people hate hipsters because they perceive us as malignant cultural pirates, carelessly co-opting other people’s coolness, thereby robbing said cultures of any “authenticity.”

I would ask you this: is x-culture so flimsy that it collapses beneath the weight of gentle homage (and occasional pastiche) at the hands of ironic urban youth? Are the hippie concerts you love of such fragile cultural capital that sharing them with a few mustachioed, fixed-gear-riding baristas could dilute the universal artistic sentiments of smoking weed and not working too hard? Perhaps, instead of being so territorial over your stuff, you and the rest of the hipster haters could just accept the flattery of imitation. We’re cool. We like your stuff. Ergo, your stuff is cool. Dig?

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Undocumented workers break for Trump in 2024

Illegals Vote for Felon
Next Article

Tigers In Cairo owes its existence to Craigslist

But it owes its name to a Cure tune and a tattoo

Dear Hipster:

Why are all you such pretentious douches? Is it wrong of me to want to hit all of you in the face? What is especially troubling is how you guys are now starting to show up at the “hippie” concerts that I love. Why don’t you just keep listening to Mumford and Sons, you have already stolen them from us, and, frankly, we don’t want them back.

Sponsored
Sponsored

— Jack

What flavor Haterade are you drinking there? I at least hope the chilling callousness with which you disregard an entire subculture keeps it icy cold! Nobody likes warm bitterness.

Besides, hating hipsters is so mainstream.

You see what I did there? By pointing out how unoriginal your anti-hipster platform is, I deflect your rage. Your anger glances off my Wayfarers as I crash your hippie concert. Did you catch O.A.R. at the BellyUp? I was at a Terrible Ivan house show in South Park that night.

But, seriously, who doesn’t hate hipsters these days? There’s a glut of blogs, a tumult of Tumblrs, a concussive mass of YouTube videos all vitriolic toward hipsterkind. People go so far as to wish death, or at least collective face punching, upon total strangers. And for what? The common complaint goes like, “those fucking hipsters stole my x,” where x can be hippie concerts, fashion, or beverage. An old, but still Google-popular, post from a blogger (the ironically named and not-very-wise, “Unconventional Wisdom”) accused hipsters of stealing her favorite beer, Pabst Blue Ribbon. So what if she hadn’t even been born yet when Pabst sales experienced their historical peak in 1977? I would illustrate here that people hate hipsters because they perceive us as malignant cultural pirates, carelessly co-opting other people’s coolness, thereby robbing said cultures of any “authenticity.”

I would ask you this: is x-culture so flimsy that it collapses beneath the weight of gentle homage (and occasional pastiche) at the hands of ironic urban youth? Are the hippie concerts you love of such fragile cultural capital that sharing them with a few mustachioed, fixed-gear-riding baristas could dilute the universal artistic sentiments of smoking weed and not working too hard? Perhaps, instead of being so territorial over your stuff, you and the rest of the hipster haters could just accept the flattery of imitation. We’re cool. We like your stuff. Ergo, your stuff is cool. Dig?

Comments
Sponsored

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Escondido planners nix office building switch to apartments

Not enough open space, not enough closets for Hickory Street plans
Next Article

Syrian treat maker Hakmi Sweets makes Dubai chocolate bars

Look for the counter shop inside a Mediterranean grill in El Cajon
Comments
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader