Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Why Bill Clinton uses so many pens to sign a bill

Idi Amin shopping at Safeway in Saudi Arabia, Papa Doc eating burgers in Paris

As thanks for a job well done, the prez hands out little gifts after the ceremony. - Image by Rick Geary
As thanks for a job well done, the prez hands out little gifts after the ceremony.

Dear Matt: Saw Bill Clinton on TV signing his name to a stack of documents. There were at least a dozen pens lined up on his desk, and he used a different pen for each signature. Why is this? Are they high-quality pens or cheapos? Also, how badly must paper currency be defaced or mutilated before its value is negated? And whatever became of ldi Amin? — Deputy Director of Intelligence, Decentralized Intelligence Agency, Oceanside

Is the prez pilfering from the White House supply cabinet? Or maybe after a particularly satisfying bout of document-signing, he sits in his prez chair with the First Feet up on the big prez desk and tries to get Bics to stick in the ceiling. Maybe he draws fake tattoos on his hand or throws pens at Socks

Sponsored
Sponsored

If none of those scenarios prove to be the truth, how about this one. Behind every piece of legislation are dozens of worker bees who’ve seen to its passage — congressfolk, Cabinet members, lobbyists, other cheerleaders and wheel-greasers. As thanks for a job well done, the prez hands out little gifts after the ceremony. But rather than throwing one pen on the floor and chuckling as everybody bites and kicks and pulls hair to get the prize, the prez uses as many pens as there are worker bees, then hands them out ceremoniously with a big grinny handshake.

The presidential pens are made by Parker for the Democratic National Committee, which pays for them. They’re inscribed with his signature and the White House seal. Formulabs in Escondido makes the presidential ink, which must be eternally fade-proof, of course. Never trust a president who uses those quick-fading felt-tips. George Washington probably didn’t give away presidential goose quills, since Franklin Roosevelt is generally cited as the instigator of the big pen giveaway.

Does Idi Amin prefer ballpoint or fountain? If you’d like to ask him yourself, hustle over to Jeddah, Saudi Arabia. He’s not likely to answer his villa door, but according to a slew of news reports, just look for somebody who’s 6'3", 300 pounds, dressed in Saudi robes, and possibly driving a Chevrolet Caprice. Idi, the muy loco Ugandan dictator and mass-murder poster boy, hustled out of Africa in 1979 after a coup. The 71-year-old father of 43 does his own shopping at the local Safeway. You didn’t ask, but while I was at it, I checked on Jean-Claude “Baby Doc” Duvalier, former dictator of Haiti. He and Mom (Mrs. “Papa Doc”) are in a Paris flat eating burgers, watching TV, and dodging creditors. If you believe everything you read, his lifestyle took a severe beating when Mrs. Baby Doc walked out with the secret Swiss bank account numbers.

Clearly this is no problem for Jean-Claude, but a dollar bill’s value isn’t ever “negated,” no matter how funky it gets, as long as it’s still recognizable as legal tender. Paper currency is pulled out of circulation by our local banks, who trade it in to Federal Reserve banks for the fresh, crisp stuff. The criteria for rejection are subjective (unless a bill’s torn), so just think about the grubbiest bills you commonly see in circulation, then figure it’s something slightly worse than that.

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

Classical Classical at The San Diego Symphony Orchestra

A concert I didn't know I needed
Next Article

Bait and Switch at San Diego Symphony

Concentric contemporary dims Dvorak
As thanks for a job well done, the prez hands out little gifts after the ceremony. - Image by Rick Geary
As thanks for a job well done, the prez hands out little gifts after the ceremony.

Dear Matt: Saw Bill Clinton on TV signing his name to a stack of documents. There were at least a dozen pens lined up on his desk, and he used a different pen for each signature. Why is this? Are they high-quality pens or cheapos? Also, how badly must paper currency be defaced or mutilated before its value is negated? And whatever became of ldi Amin? — Deputy Director of Intelligence, Decentralized Intelligence Agency, Oceanside

Is the prez pilfering from the White House supply cabinet? Or maybe after a particularly satisfying bout of document-signing, he sits in his prez chair with the First Feet up on the big prez desk and tries to get Bics to stick in the ceiling. Maybe he draws fake tattoos on his hand or throws pens at Socks

Sponsored
Sponsored

If none of those scenarios prove to be the truth, how about this one. Behind every piece of legislation are dozens of worker bees who’ve seen to its passage — congressfolk, Cabinet members, lobbyists, other cheerleaders and wheel-greasers. As thanks for a job well done, the prez hands out little gifts after the ceremony. But rather than throwing one pen on the floor and chuckling as everybody bites and kicks and pulls hair to get the prize, the prez uses as many pens as there are worker bees, then hands them out ceremoniously with a big grinny handshake.

The presidential pens are made by Parker for the Democratic National Committee, which pays for them. They’re inscribed with his signature and the White House seal. Formulabs in Escondido makes the presidential ink, which must be eternally fade-proof, of course. Never trust a president who uses those quick-fading felt-tips. George Washington probably didn’t give away presidential goose quills, since Franklin Roosevelt is generally cited as the instigator of the big pen giveaway.

Does Idi Amin prefer ballpoint or fountain? If you’d like to ask him yourself, hustle over to Jeddah, Saudi Arabia. He’s not likely to answer his villa door, but according to a slew of news reports, just look for somebody who’s 6'3", 300 pounds, dressed in Saudi robes, and possibly driving a Chevrolet Caprice. Idi, the muy loco Ugandan dictator and mass-murder poster boy, hustled out of Africa in 1979 after a coup. The 71-year-old father of 43 does his own shopping at the local Safeway. You didn’t ask, but while I was at it, I checked on Jean-Claude “Baby Doc” Duvalier, former dictator of Haiti. He and Mom (Mrs. “Papa Doc”) are in a Paris flat eating burgers, watching TV, and dodging creditors. If you believe everything you read, his lifestyle took a severe beating when Mrs. Baby Doc walked out with the secret Swiss bank account numbers.

Clearly this is no problem for Jean-Claude, but a dollar bill’s value isn’t ever “negated,” no matter how funky it gets, as long as it’s still recognizable as legal tender. Paper currency is pulled out of circulation by our local banks, who trade it in to Federal Reserve banks for the fresh, crisp stuff. The criteria for rejection are subjective (unless a bill’s torn), so just think about the grubbiest bills you commonly see in circulation, then figure it’s something slightly worse than that.

Comments
Sponsored

The latest copy of the Reader

Please enjoy this clickable Reader flipbook. Linked text and ads are flash-highlighted in blue for your convenience. To enhance your viewing, please open full screen mode by clicking the icon on the far right of the black flipbook toolbar.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

In-n-Out alters iconic symbol to reflect “modern-day California”

Keep Palm and Carry On?
Next Article

Spa-Like Facial Treatment From Home - This Red Light Therapy Mask Makes It Possible

Comments
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

This Week’s Reader This Week’s Reader