Five million stolen dollars are secreted in a coffin to be shipped cross-country by rail. The coffin, as chance would have it, is commandeered in the train depot by an imposter soldier, who drapes it with the American flag he happens to be carrying, in order to evade a couple of suspicious MPs. The imposter's uniform has come from a pawnbroker's shop into which he had ducked, wearing only boxer shorts, to evade the police. The police had been after him because he was found flagrante delicto in the bathtub with the police chief's wife. He had taken refuge there in order to evade the women's roller derby team whom he owes several weeks' wages. Got it so far? It goes on like that, most of the way aboard the train -- fast enough, but never really funny enough, although Richard Lester's vaunted mean streak sometimes provides a close-enough substitute. With Michael O'Keefe, Beverly D'Angelo, and Louis Gossett, Jr. (1984) — Duncan Shepherd
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