Tim Burton’s tiresome tribute to the TV goth soaper, with Johnny Depp fully committed as the heavily made-up vampire Barnabas. Their devotion is real, but the film is a rummage of poor gags and plot fragments that add up to little. It has campy design touches, corny creep-outs, vivid women (Michelle Pfeiffer, Bella Heathcote, witty Helena Bonham Carter, vampy witch Eva Green), and an aura of wasted expenditure. With Jackie Earle Haley, Christopher Lee, and a tiny cameo by the late Jonathan Frid, the definitive Barnabas. (2012) — David Elliott
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