If the original dropped like a diamond in the Christmas stocking, this unavoidable sequel lands like a lump of coal. Max Lieberman, who did such a splendid job scripting the original, appears to have crumbled under the weight of Chris Columbus’ (Home Alone I & II, Mrs. Doubtfire) desire to squeeze out another Gremlins sequel, leaving the audience to wonder WWJDD? (What would Joe Dante Do?) Columbus, who produced the original, now takes director and co-screenwriter credit. Kurt Russell’s role as the coolest Claus on record is greatly diminished in favor of a derivative plot that borrows heavily from Columbus’ past glory (he wrote Gremlins) while ripping off Back to the Future in the process. As much as one loves seeing Goldie Hawn back on the screen, her kindly Mrs. C is no match for her real-life paramour’s (they spent the past 37 years in happily unmarried bliss) bravura turn as the trimmest Santa on record. The introduction of rogue elf Belsnickel (Julian Dennison) as the film’s prime source of provocation proves to be anything but provocative; the CG reindeer are endowed with more character than he. Darlene Love spinning a Christmas tune with Kurt Claus is one of the film’s few moments to remember. The rest is effects-driven formlessness not worthy of your time. Watch the original twice and bail on this. (2020) — Scott Marks
This movie is not currently in theaters.