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Kids-on-top pipe dream that pictures the grownups locked in the cellar till they learn their lesson. TV-grade comedy by a TV-graduate director, Harry Winer. With Kyle Howard, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jamie Lee Curtis, Kevin Pollak, Jennifer Tilly, Wallace Shawn.

Disney animated literary adaptation, with songs. And, despite the track record of Victor Hugo as a begetter of hit musicals (Les Miz), not a good idea. Not even if you have the "vision," the nerve, the self-servingness, to see clear to how the twice-told tale of the bell-tower hermit Quasimodo …

A concert film that's also a cogent piece of interview journalism, telling a sad story, with good humor and philosophical detachment, about how the fun and innocence of the Seattle music "scene," pre-1992, got spoiled by the infusion of money and publicity. (Many of the interviewees -- from such groups …

A conscious and conscientious throwback to the invaders-from-space fables of the Eisenhower era: simply and straightforwardly War of the Worlds with updated hardware. But it won't do to be too blasé over the derivativeness. Film, as we've all been instructed but haven't all yet learned, is a visual medium, and …

The first love of physicist Richard Feynman (not counting science), a childhood sweetheart doomed to an early tubercular death while her new husband helped build the A-bomb. There is plenty of sweetness; plenty, thanks to the main character, of eccentricity (his bloodhound experiment to detect the scent of his beloved …

A former merchant seaman, now adrift on land, gets himself in a tight squeeze between his sex-starved landlady and her pubescent daughter. Supercilious snigger over the wormy underside of Fifties-era England: "You're a hyp -- a hyp -- what's that word? You're a bloody hippo!" With Julie Walters, Rupert Graves, …

A bad idea about a bad idea. The second idea, purely hypothetical, is to do a French remake of Louis Feuillade's silent serial, Les Vampires, with Hong Kong action star Maggie Cheung as the criminal ringleader, Irma Vep. The first idea is to do a pseudodocumentary film about the making …

This could be about no one but Valerie Solanas, the militant lesbian, founder of the one-member Society for Cutting Up Men (S.C.U.M.) and author of its "manifesto," would-be playwright, part-time panhandler and streetwalker, full-time chainsmoker, who in 1968 pumped a couple of slugs at point-blank range into the then King …

Second remake, at the least, of the H.G. Wells fable of the beast in man and vice versa, originally made in the early Thirties under the name of Island of Lost Souls. Marlon Brando, as the mad doctor-slash-dictator, makes a splashy entrance half an hour into the action, in Tiny …

Before completely losing his mind, vision, and looks, an AIDS sufferer throws a two-day goodbye bash to be capped by his suicide. Inadequate writing and directing (Randal Kleiser, both jobs) transform a painful and complex subject into a simple embarrassment. With Eric Roberts, Gregory Harrison, Margaret Cho, Bronson Pinchot, Lee …

Filmographically speaking, the seventh or so of Robin Williams's excuses to act like a child -- the closest in time and in alphabet to Jumanji, though in the second way almost as close, and in phonetics even closer, to Hook -- must command a certain amount of clinical interest. Not …

Mixed-media adaptation (live action, cartoon, stop-motion animation) of the Roald Dahl children's book, from the Disney studio, and more specifically from Henry Selick of Tim Burton's The Nightmare before Christmas. The self-consciously "dreamlike" narrative concerns an unloved orphan who, accompanied by oversized English-speaking insects, sails off for the Big Apple …

The chief reason to see this remake, and sufficient reason to have made it, is for the spectacle of the bony Charlotte Gainsbourg nibbling away at the meaty title role. For that, we have to wait half an hour while the protagonist goes through her ill-used childhood ("At Lowood, we …

Tom Cruise, in the role of a high-flying sports agent who belatedly finds some scruples ("Who had I become? Just another shark in a suit?") and in consequence loses all his clients but one, is more tightly wound than usual. And he comes more thoroughly, rapidly, and frequently unwound than …

Chillingly ugly — in both spirit and appearance — holiday comedy about a workaholic Minneapolitan who has postponed his Christmas shopping until December 24, and then doesn't care who he has to step on to get his hands on the precious Turbo Man action-figure. Another unsuitable part, under the name …

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