An oscillating orphan grows into a highly successful, Vegas-style motivational speaker who, after a 5 month stint in the pen for insider trading, reinvents herself as a chocolate brownie baroness. With her red wig in place, Melissa McCarthy wants like crazy to assume the Lucille Ball mantle, but all America’s favorite deadhead has to show for herself is an inferior remake of Troop Beverly Hills. McCarthy’s patented schtick is verbally avalanching a sentence into a page of stammering, profanity-tinged dialogue. The physical execution of the comedic centerpiece — a street fight involving girl scouts and their mothers — is funnier than anything McCarthy has to say. As always in a film such as this, the biggest laughs come from the eleventh hour, pathos-laden comedown, this time at the hands of the young daughter of her apprentice-turned-savior (Kristen Bell). Forced, unfunny, and otherwise ugly on every level. “Directed” by Mr. McCarthy. With Peter “Achondroplasia-For-Hire” Dinklage, reduced to picking up Verne Troyer’s script rejects. (2016) — Scott Marks
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