Not unlike their idols, George and Steve, whose Raiders of the Lost Ark stemmed from misty-eyed memories of the lumbering Republic Serials they grew up on, childhood (and childish) xerographers Chris Strompolos, Eric Zala, and Jayson Lamb were weaned on crap. Why else would the trio devote eight summers of their lives to a shot-for-shot remake of Spielberg’s nadir? If imitation is the sincerest form of failure, place this tribute to a fanboy riff on a fanboy riff at the bottom of the heap. Look and listen hard to dig up a motherlode of satirically contemptuous nuggets. An original script credits “Stephen S.” (Some idol.) The boys stop patting themselves on the back only when their hands are needed to snuff out a crew member accidentally set ablaze. Lamb cites “Jacques Cocteau’s” Beauty and the Beast as an inspiration. Even more embarrassing is the finished product, portions of which I was once subjected to while volunteering at a local radio station. Unoriginal behavior such as this should be shunned, not encouraged. Directed by Jeremy Coon and Tim Skousen. (2016) — Scott Marks
This movie is not currently in theaters.